Infliction |Infected Book 2|

Chapter 23 - Confessions

Desi

We all sat silent staring at each other, Ryder frozen with shock while Cody and I were frozen with embarrassment. I felt Cody's arms wrap tighter around me, protectively, but I tried to slide away, my feet touching the floor.

“No,” Ryder said, stepping back towards the door. “Stay there. You looked pretty comfortable.” Glancing away from me, he walked out the room his head hanging down towards the floor.

Abruptly, I stood up off of Cody's lap and went towards the door, when Cody reached out, wrapping his fingers around my wrist. I spun around to face him, his face full of worry.

“The last time you went after him you didn't want to come back to me,” Cody whispered. “Please don't go.”

I walked towards him, my hand reaching out to his head, his hair falling between my fingers. “I'll come back Cody. I just need to make sure he's okay. He would do the same for me.”

Cody reached up, grabbing my hand, bringing it down to his lips, kissing my fingers lightly. “I understand,” he said before dropping my hand.

I walked backwards, keeping my eyes on Cody, memorizing his face into my mind so that no matter what Ryder says to me, I'll be keeping Cody in my thoughts and I will come back to him this time.

When I got to the hallway, I turned and walked into the living room seeing Durbin and Doc conversing in the kitchen. They both looked towards me when I entered the room.

“Where did he go?” I asked, noticing that Ryder wasn't here with them.

“He's out on the balcony,” Durbin said, pointing towards the open glass door. “I wouldn't go out there if I were you though. He looked pretty upset.”

“Durbin, I'm pretty sure I can handle it,” I told him, but could I? What if Ryder told me he loved me again, or kissed me? Would I be able to keep Cody in my mind or would my love for Ryder overpower Cody's? I remembered Cody's hands on my body as we kissed, the electricity running through my veins. Yes, I can handle it, I told myself.

“It's your funeral,” Durbin said as I walked towards the balcony.

I hesitated when I was at the door, preparing myself for how angry he might be. I clenched my fists and tried to calm the butterflies fluttering chaotically in my stomach and stepped through the open glass door, closing it behind me.

When the door clicked shut, Ryder popped his head up away from his hands, his elbows on his knees as he sat in a chair. His cheeks were glistening in the moonlight, his fingers quickly lifting to wipe under his eyes.

“Are you crying?” I asked, shocked, guilt flooding through me.

“No,” Ryder answered quickly; too quickly. He wouldn't look in my direction, his eyes gazing out over the railing into the sea of lights on the street.

Silence commenced between us, me looking at him, him trying to avoid looking at me. I wanted to reach out and touch his arm to tell him how sorry I am, but I choked seeing him upset like this. Nothing I could say would take away this pain from him.

“I thought you said you didn't choose him,” Ryder said suddenly, making me jump, nerves building up inside of me even more.

“I-I didn't at the time,” I stumbled over my words, hating this confrontation we were having right now.

“But yet there you were,” he said, his jaw throbbing. “You could have told me, you know. It would have been a lot easier than walking in on you two.”