The Royals

Chapter 15: Conflicted

Now they can see the tears in our eyes

But we deny the pain that lies deep in our hearts

Well maybe that's a pain we can't hide

Cause everybody knows that we're both torn apart

Why do we hurt each other

Why do we push love away

-Boys 2 Men Water Runs Dry

I had to tell him. I didn't want to, but I had to.

I had already let Harry in deep. Too deep. I had allowed him to take a look into my mind and see exactly who I was, what my life entailed, what was to become of me. Things that I wasn't planning on ever letting him know.

I thought that my relationship with Dean would overshadow everything I felt for Harry. Dean was the best. He was caring, he was sweet, he was honest. He was the perfect gentleman, always there for me when I needed him. Any girl would be lucky to have him.

But he just wasn't Harry. And I felt really bad that i still cared for Harry the way I did. Even more actually because I now knew that he had feelings for me as well. And the fact that he listened to me, comforted me, and wanted to help me with my problems warmed my heart.

I wouldn't have been able to open up to Dean the way I could Harry. Sure Dean knew some things, like how I really wasn't the bitchy Slytherin everyone thought I was, and that Mum and I didn't get along, but other than that I felt like I couldn't tell him. Like he really wouldn't understand. Sure he could sympathize, but he would never understand.

But then again if I showed him the letter, maybe he would.

I had sent him an owl to meet me in the Astronomy tower. That's where we would go sometimes if we wanted to be completely alone.

I stood up there where I had transfigured a box into a small fireplace so we could keep warm and waited. Dean could always make it bigger.

A couple minutes later Dean came through the trapdoor smiling at me. He walked over and kissed me, his adorable grin plastered on his face.

"Someone is awfully jolly.' I said.

"Well yeah. I have something I need to tell you." said Dean cheerfully.
p
"And I have something I need to show you. But you go first."

"No you. You asked me up here."

"Dean..." I said in playful annoyance

"Go first love, I insist."

"And I insist that you go first and I'm not taking no for an answer." I said crossing my arms playfully.

"Fine then."said Dean kissing me on the cheek. "Well, for starters, I have owled my mum about you many times."

I was surprised. "Really? You told her about me?"

"Of course I did. I had to tell her about the girl that was keeping her son happy now didn't I?"

I blushed and nodded. He was Honeydukes sweet.

"Anyways, I did and she owled me asking if she could meet you and invited you to spend Easter holiday with me. That is, if you want." said Dean looking like a hopeful kid at Christmas.

"Oh..." I said feeling even more terrible than I had originally.

"Something wrong?" asked Dean.

"Well what I have to show you has to do with Easter holiday. Actually, it has to do with a lot of things." I said as I took Mum's letter out of my pocket and gave it to him to read.