Mate Hater

Chapter Thirty-One

Nina's POV

Everything felt right. Laying in bed cuddled up next to Jaxon felt more normal than breathing. It astounded me how easily it was to give him my soul, to give him all my trust. As we laid tangled with one another a soft hum was heard, both of our bodies hummed in contentment with the completed bond. I had never felt so whole than I did right then. It was a feeling that was unexplainable.

"I love you," Jaxon whispered into my hair. I wanted to hit replay and just listen to him say it all day. That was the first time he had said it, I knew he loved me but there was something about him voicing it that melted me deeper into him.

Even though I had already told him that I loved him earlier I said it back. "I love you too."

He pulled me closer to him. His muscular arms were wrapped around my abdomen, his head neatly tucked into the crook of my neck. Jaxon would periodically place light kisses along the length of my neck, and they'd send me into a heated frenzy for more.

As much as I would've loved to stayed wrapped in his arms and in that moment of bliss, we both knew we had a lot of work to do. Reluctantly we broke apart and I rushed to take another shower due to the amount of physical activity we did that morning. Jaxon tried to join me in my quick shower and although the offer was more than tempting, I told him if he stepped into that shower we wouldn't be out for at least another hour or so. The cocky grin that appeared on his face at my comment made me roll my eyes.

Before I went into the bathroom I made sure I had a change of clothes. One can only make the mistake of not bringing clothes into the bathroom so many times before they finally realize that it never works out well. The next time I walked into Jaxon's room I was fully dressed for the eventful day ahead of me. I was trying to prepare myself mentally for all the stress I was about to endure, that itself was a difficult task to achieve.

I made a mental checklist of everything I had to do and everyone I needed to check on. Checking in on Keiva was the first item on the list. A little ping of guilt washed over me because if I was being a good Alpha I would've checked on her first thing this morning. I shook my head to get rid of all the negative thoughts, I knew Keiva would flip out as soon as she noticed Jaxon's scent entangled in mine. I could already see her wiggling her eyebrows at me in the suggestive manner and wanting to know all the dirty details.

"Why are you shaking your head?" Jaxon asked from across the room.

My head shot up in his direction, I was so engrossed in my own thoughts I didn't realize he was waiting for me. "I was just thinking about Keiva and how she's going to freak out when she realizes we finished the bond."

He nodded his head in confirmation and his lips twitched upwards a little. It looked like he wanted to say something but was holding back. A part of me wanted to ask what it was he wasn't telling me, but another part was urging me to check on my Beta.

Putting aside the desire to ask Jaxon what it was he wasn't saying, I followed him out of the room and down a series of halls until we reached a long hallway that was designated to pack members. Jaxon told me Keiva's room was the fourth one down on the right side. After he told me what room she was in he kissed my head then informed me he would be pack before dinner after he took care of some pack business.

Immediately after he was out of my sight I had this hole in my heart. The feeling of not being next to him was suffocating. I almost wanted to chase after him and demand him to never leave my side again. How was I supposed to go through the rest of the day with this heart wrenching ache in my chest?

Power through, I told myself. This is how it's going to be from now on everytime I'm not around him and I had to deal with it. I couldn't give in and become completely dependent on him. I still needed to be my own person.