Chapter Six: A Disgraced Teen's Battles

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Broken Hearts & Lonely Stars:

Chapter Six: A Disgraced Teen's Scars

        I pulled myself back, staring at Johnny with wide eyes. Never and I mean NEVER have I seen the raw emotion in those yellow green eyes of his. An emotion I tried running away from since the day my heart was broken and seeing it in my best friend's eyes was difficult to deny ever knowing of it. I looked away, clearing my throat nervously as I watched my best friend from the corner of my eye furrow his eyebrows in confusion before taking a sip of Coke, gazing off in the distance with a blank look in his eyes.

I bit my lower lip, not liking the awkward silence between us. Johnny's my best friend, why would he pull off a stunt like that?! He was the very first person that I told him I was lesbian yet he kissed me? Johnny Blazer, the biggest womanizer in high school, kissed me? I narrowed my eyes, drinking more of my Dr. Pepper as I watched the kids skate, laughing and yelling at their boards out of frustration for not landing on their tricks.

I cleared my thraot again as I opened my mouth and blurted out, "I'm gay, Johnny."

The way his yellow green eyes drifted from viewing the young skaters to mine ever so slowly made my heart pound hard against my chest. Something inside me snapped and I felt like I was melting underneath his gaze. Why am I feeling like this?

"I know," he said, his emotionless eyes gazed at me as his face held no expression.

"Then, why did you kiss me if you know I'm gay?" I asked him, confused out of my mind.

He chuckled, tossing the empty can to the side, "Rhea, I'm your best friend and a guy. Guys chase girls who give a challenge. We're primal since the early dawning of Man. Even though you're sleeping with girls and give off the 'Lesbian' vibe, you're still attracted to guys. It's a hormonal fact and there's nothing to deny about it. Doesn't matter if you're gay, bisexual, trans-gender, you're still human so why keep labeling yourself."

I gaped at him. "W-what?"

He stood up, running his fingers through his brown locks as he gazed at me with those emotionless eyes. A smirk playing on those pink lips of his as he grabbed Otis' leash and before he straightened himself, his face was inches away, leaving me gasping in slight fright of the close proximity. "Stop denying and let your heart lead your way instead of your stubborn head--"

"Quit it, Johnny!" I snapped, getting to my feet as I glared at him with pure hatred and anger that I've held inside me for so long. "There's nothing to deny, okay?! I am who I am and if you're giving me bullshit to deny something I don't even know then I suggest you to fuck off. This is my life and I'm not going to let you confuse me into wanting something I truly don't. What's with you, man? Out of a sudden you kiss me and you're saying stupid shit of denying this and that. What the fuck's wrong with you?!"

His lips tightened into a fine line as he towered over me, glaring down at me as he spat out through his clenched teeth, "You really want to know what's wrong with me?"

"YES! For fuck's sake, tell me!"

His yellow green eyes darkened as his nostrils flared from the fury he held inside. It felt like an atomic bomb was shot into the air, slowly coming to its target in a silent night before everything explodes, bringing disaster and death.

"You shouldn't be the one angry, Rhea," he spat back to me, gripping Otis' leash tightly in his fist. "What person keeps a secret for four fucking years without giving a phone call to their best friend about their condition?!"

I froze, my eyes widening in fear and shock.

Johnny...knew. He found out. But how? How could my best friend discover one of my secrets that I've held so long? All the work of hiding the pain I've gone through and letting everyone believe my plastic smiles and forced laughter has gone down the toilet. It was meant to be a silent goodbye once I leave L.A again but now that Johnny knew...everything seemed impossible to leave.

And the only thing I did to get out of this situation was getting on my longboard and skated away as fast as I can with my heart dropped in the long run.

~*~

"Aren't you going to stay the night, baby?"

I looked at the naked girl in disgust. I don't know what overcame me to sleep with her but I needed a distraction from going home where Johnny would be lurking, ready to assault me with questions and yelling. I shrugged into my shirt and stood up, shoving my keys, phone, and cigarette pack into my pockets while the blond haired girl crawled to the end of her bed, not embarrassed to be fully naked in front of me.

"No," I flatly told her. "I need to go somewhere."

She pouted, "Well, you have my number."

"I'll call you," I lied as I weaved my way out of her house, grabbing my longboard that was perched beside the front door and left the house only to realize that I was on a familiar street where a certain girl stepped out of her Volkswagen and froze at the sight of me.

Her golden brown hair was pulled back into a ponytail messily as her uniform looked wrinkly and hastily put on. Her cheeks were flushed and her lips were swollen and pink as if...

I tore my gaze away from her as I got on my longboard, ready to leave this street and face Johnny instead of this whore but I never got a chance when I was tackled to the ground, groaning when a shot of pain coursed through my body.

"You fucking whore!" Someone cried out when fists hit my back. "You left me to screw another girl and also my boss's daughter!" The voice screeched in frustration as I twisted myself and glared up at Bridget who wiped away her tears.

"It's not like we're fucking together, Bridget!" I snapped at her. "We were back in high school but I dumped your slutty ass. The thing we did at Johnny's pad was a fling, nothing else. Stop being self centered and leave me the hell alone!"

"A fling?" She whispered, sadness creeping in her voice.

I pushed her off of me, not caring that she landed on her ass. I got to my feet, dusting myself off while glaring at the girl who brought me more pain than I ever had. "Don't just yell at me for sleeping with other girls. It's not like you're an innocent angel. Cheating and sleeping with any guy you see aren't an advantage to get my trust back, Bridget."

Suddenly, she burst out in tears, hugging her knees to her chest as she sobbed dramatically. "I-I'm s-sorry, Rhea!"

"Well, I'm not," I spat back to her, coldly before leaving her there on the ground as I headed back home.

Even though I went through the battles of keeping my secrets and facing my ex each day, I knew it wasn't over. There was a bigger war that would destroy my path of becoming someone I wanted to be.

And that war involved going to my parents' house.

Well, what a lovely hell to enter.

_______________________________

What's Rhea's big secret that Johnny found out?

'Til the next one \m/

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