The lake was our favorite hangout. We had our Saturday swim routine.
We would pack food and later eat them under the big oak tree. There was
a special branch in which the two of us could sit together and tell each
other’s dreams. She dreams of being a Ballerina and she knows my dream
of becoming a doctor. She never laughs at my dreams and pursuits even if
they were quite impossible. It made me like her even more.
As years went by, I noticed that my feelings towards her were slowly
changing. Somehow, I thought it was just a simple crush case. But when I
started thinking about her at night, dreaming of her and having the feeling
of wanting to be with her all the time, I thought it was something
different, something that made me feel strange, but then it was
exhilarating feeling. It made me feel so alive. Whenever our hands touch, I
could feel the tingling sensation in my spine. Once when we were at the
lake having our Saturday swim routine and as I carried her towards the
water edge, I had the feeling of not wanting to let go. I just wanted that
moment to continue hoping it would never end. I then realized I was
slowly falling in love with my best friend.
Many times I tried to deny the feeling for I was scared to imagine what
would happen if ever I'd try to tell her how I feel about her. I was scared
because she might think that I'm taking advantage of her and our
friendship. I was afraid of losing her so I just kept my feeling hidden.
We reached the age of fifteen and I noticed that Sam grew lovelier each
day. How my heart aches wherever I see boys glance her way. I want to
punch their noses as I watch them talking to her giving compliments,
flowers and chocolates. There were times when I watch her at a distance
with mixed feelings of anger and hurt! Because it hurts so much to know
that there were so many things I wanted to tell her but then I could not do
so. There were so many presents which I long to give her but then I could
not for she might see me only as a friend. I was also scared of letting her
know how I feel about her as much as losing her.
