Ten Steps

Wow. This is amazing stuff :)

I wish this weren’t a dream though. It’ll end, it always does.

Just like life.

I hate that. Always just on the brink of ending, anything posing a threat to life. I wish I’d never listened to everyone’s warnings, “look both ways, don’t talk to strangers” I didn’t talk to anyone, and I looked both ways. I never listened to music whilst crossing the road either. Safety wise, I was great: as safe as the next ordinary girl; safe from strangers, safe from getting hit by a bus, so long as I paid attention. Attention… would that have saved me from everything? Was I really walking around actually ignoring everything around me, convinced that I was fully awake? Was I ever truly awake at all? Well, at least I’m awake now- everything is so bright, and so beautiful… All the definition in the world, crammed into my eyes. But that means I can see it, see what happened. Over and over again it replays behind my eyes; glancing down at my hands, clutching the last piece of paper; my little school survey. Then glancing up at the last house, the same as all the others but colder, darker.... No, it was my imagination, nothing but my imagination. It was just that on my way home every night, I rushed past this place and wrapped my arms about myself. Focus my eyes forward, one, two, three, four, five, six… ten and I’m past the drive. Today I take those steps upward, sideways instead of forwards. Today I knock on that door, and ask politely,

“Hello, please could I ask you a few questions?”

I can’t seem to clearly see myself heading up the drive, and reaching for the doorbell. I just remember the door swinging open, and my small quiet voice asking one of the last questions ever spoken at that door.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is there anyone there?”

My voice echoed emptily down the derelict hall. I took one cautious step inward, then another. I took ten in the end. I was about to turn around too, but something caught my attention.  A noise or maybe a small light, I don’t know, but something was there. It was ironic really- I’d always been suspicious of this house, always dreaded what was in it. Now I was walking down a dark hall, the wallpaper peeling off the walls, a smell of damp filling my nose. This is the point where you’re yelling at me, begging for me to turn and run as fast as I could. And I did that; every book, every film, I begged the character to turn and leave, to save themselves before it’s too late... But you know now, don’t you? You know what happened next. I turned and started to walk, moving further from the ominous ticking coming from the box I’d just noticed next to the stairs. Then I started to run, but that typical thing happened to me- the door stretched further and further away. My feet felt glued, and my lungs stretched. The ticking slowed…

Tick… tock… tick… tock…  

Then white light, and white heat. So, so hot... The air in my lungs rushed out with a finality that amazed me. Oh, those final memories that fleeted around my head; family, friends, laughter. Those memories are my dreams now, the rest my nightmares- Sirens approaching, people running in the street. But I’m not watching through my old eyes- these ones are new, but you can’t see them. I can’t see them most of the time. But at this time of year- a light breeze brushing the trees, gentle sunshine warming your skin- and you’ll pass the empty building yard in what looks like the middle of nowhere. But look at the rubble and dust moving in the breeze- then you’ll see me, a small tornado… a whisper in the trees. And you’ll wrap your arms about yourself, and focus your eyes: One, two, three, four, five, six… all the way to ten. Maybe you’ll do that every day, and wonder why. It’s because I’m warning you, or trying to at least. My life is over; all I have is dreams… maybe if I’d taken more risks I would have been safe from what happened that day, maybe I’d have known. What I’m telling you now is pay attention, because then I’d have known there’d been terror threats that day, and the police had just got a tip off about the placement of a bomb. And maybe if I’d paid enough attention, I’d have left earlier. The place had been destroyed once before in an arson attack; I guess something in me already knew. The place was cursed, but the next buyer’s ready to take the risk. Stay away, do as your nerves tell you- they’ll save you. So don’t talk to strangers, and look both ways. Never listen to music whilst crossing the road. But count those ten steps on your way home, and wrap your arms around your body and focus your eyes forward. It will save you, if you pay attention. It would have saved me, but I ignored it.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten…

Ten seconds can change anything. Pay attention for every single one of them.

 Every, single, one.

Thank you for reading, I sincerely hope that you enjoyed and understood this story. If not, primarily I offer my apologies because I know that sometimes I can write things that eventually are lost to even me :P Anyway, I guess this is sort of dedicated to anyone affected by simple human errors which if paid more attention to could be prevented. Keep reading you crazy beautiful people :) x