Hired // l.h.

Chapter 49

**this chapter is a memory**

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"Vi!" My smile widened as I heard the voice of the one person who called me that. My heart began beating so fast it felt like it was going to explode.

"Hi." It comes out like a breath, like I couldn't actually speak. I opened my front door wider to allow him in.

"Is Callie still here?" He takes his shoes off on the mat and takes a quick sweep of the first floor.

"No. I told her to go back home like you told me to. And I made cookies for you in the kitchen."

"Chocolate chip?"

"No. Sugar. I thought you said you liked sugar cookies."

He shrugs his shoulders. "I only want chocolate chip right now." I hesitate for just a second before leading him into the empty living room.

"Lets go to the basement. I want to play some video games." I quickly nod my head and follow Aiden down to the basement. He takes control, turning on the console and tv and putting the game in that he wanted to play.

"You're still wearing your hair like that?" I subconsciously touch the slightly frizzy curls. "It's to frizzy like that. I like it straight. Or maybe just slightly wavy." I quickly nod, pulling my hair up into a bun on the top of my head.

I sit down next to him on the couch, not quite touching him. He moved last time I did that and I didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

"Do you need anything?" He doesn't look away from the screen as I speak. Doesn't have any reaction to show that he heard me. "Aiden." He pauses the game and turns his head. "Do you need anything?"

"I need you to be quiet so I can concentrate." I let out a breath and quickly shut my mouth as he once again begins playing. I guess we just have one of those relationships where we just want to be in each others presence, we don't really need to be doing something all the time.

I sit and watch him play the video game for maybe an hour. Keegan is still out with his friends which means it couldn't have been to long.

I jump as the remote gets thrown next to me, nearly hitting my side. Aiden swears a few times at the screen before looking over at me. Before I can even process anything, he's on top of me.

Affection. It's not something he shows often, but right now he's reminding me how he actually feels about me.

His hand goes underneath my shirt, causing a knot to form in my stomach. His hand slowly travels up my stomach before I grab onto it right before it reaches the bottom of my bra.

"Don't be such a prude. It's ok. I love you."

"I love you, too." He smiles as I remove my hand. His hand rests on my breast, but my whole body almost goes numb. That's how much I love him. My hands move up to his hair as I involuntarily let out a moan.

The fabric of my shirt begins sliding up my waist and my hands once again go down to stop Aiden.

"C'mon, Vi. Or I'm gonna have to leave." He begins standing up off the couch and I quickly grab his hand.

"No!" My heart is beating so loudly I would be surprised if he couldn't hear it. "You can take it off." He smiles again, causing me to smile back. He slides my shirt over my head before kissing me once again. My breathing becomes heavier as his hands travel all around my torso.

"Lets start with you doing something for me." I feel my chest getting heavier and the knot in my stomach getting tighter but I nod my head. He grabs onto my wrist and leads my hand down to the button on his pants.

"Wait." I can barely talk it's so hard to breath. "I don't think I can do-"

"I do so much for you, Vi. I'm just asking you to do one thing for me."

"I can't-" He violently jumps off the couch, sending me onto the floor.

"I'll see you tomorrow." I hear his footsteps fade as he walks up the stairs.

I curl myself into a ball on the floor, reaching for my shirt and pulling it back over my head. Why did I have to be this way? Why do I have to have these stupid attacks anytime Aiden wants something? He does so much for me and whenever he wants me to do what he wants, something won't allow me. We love each other, I don't know what the problem is.

Well, I do. The problem is me. I get in the way of everything. I couldn't even make him the right cookies. I repeatedly hit my head against my hands. I'm so stupid. Why is Aiden even with me? Why does he love someone as messed up as me?

I scream and wipe the tears off my cheeks as I attempt to calm my breathing down.

I scared him away. The attacks scare him. Why am I like this? Everything is my fault. Aiden is just trying to be nice. He's trying to show me that he loves me and I ruin it every time.

"Don't tell anyone about what we do. I want it to be special between us."

How many excuses have I made for these attacks?

I'm just stressed.

I'm really tired.

I just got anxious.

I don't know what came over me.

The list goes on and on. If anyone knew the truth they would think it was stupid. Aiden would think it was stupid. We're in a relationship. We're supposed to do these things. It's normal.

I finally catch my breath and head upstairs to grab myself a glass of water. I look at the front door as I walk by. Aiden's shoes and keys are gone, there's no sign that he was here. I lock the door and get to the kitchen.

I sit up on the counter as I drink my water.

When will these attacks stop? Will they ever stop or will they constantly come between Aiden and I?

I'm just over thinking everything. I should apologize to him. I'm going to apologize to him. But is right now to soon? Should I wait until later? I don't want to annoy him. He said he had to leave so he's probably busy right now. I'll just wait. But I don't want to wait too long.

But what if he's mad? Then I should probably just text him now. Right?

Me: I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. I'm just tired I guess.

And I wait for a reply that will never come.

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Please don't ever put yourself through an unhealthy relationship. You're amazing and deserve all the best. I love you.

The difference between Aiden and Luke is just a little big. The writing style is purposefully a little different because of the difference between each relationship.

Remember at the beginning when Callie said Ivory's panic attacks stopped around a year ago? And remember when Ivory said that her and Aiden's relationship ended around a year ago? *wink wink*

One more quick message, New Years is coming up in this book and I still haven't decided what year it's going to be. Let me know what you guys think to help me decide! (Or I could just not mention a year and leave it to everyone's imagination)

I lied, this is the last message, GUESS WHO FINALLY GOT HER LAPTOP BACK! Yep, after a month my laptop is finally working again which means more updates as long as my schedule doesn't remain as busy as it is right now.

Don't forget to vote and comment!

Happy fall! (Or spring depending on where you live)