Mistakes

Ch. 2

~Three weeks later~

Dear Carley,

Winter Water College's admissions committee has reviewed your application for admission for the fall semester. After evaluating your admission portfolio, we regret to inform you that we cannot offer you admission to the college at this time.

We strongly recommend that you begin your post secondary education at another college or university...

I fight back tears of frustration as I crumple the letter up into a tight ball. This is the fourth denial letter since I've applied to college. I thought this time...this time I would be accepted. But my past ruined it once again.

Angrily throwing the ball at my bedroom wall, I curl my knees up to my chest and rest my forehead against them. Self-loathing rips through me like a knife. If only I hadn't gone out that night; if only I had run when Jake told me to. If only, if only, if only...

Those words keep replaying themselves in my head like a broken record. As I sit there I think about all the other rejection letters. They all said the same things: "We regret to inform..."

Never anything different. Always the same. And those four words would crush my hope every time. Part of me wants to give up; to forget the ridiculous idea of going to college. But another part won't give up. No matter how hard I try there's always a flicker of hope.

Lifting my head from my knees I glance over at my laptop. One more time. A small voice whispers in the remote corners of my mind. Willing myself to move, I walk over to my laptop and pick it up before returning to my place on the bed.

Booting it up I thought about the colleges I hadn't applied to. What I could say to convince them to accept me. Once the search engine pops up, I search diligently for colleges before finally coming across a local community college.

My heart slams against my ribcage as I click on the link for the online application. I hesitate for a minute as thoughts of my current denial letter come flooding back. Taking a deep breath I will it to the back of my mind.

Please let this work.

~~~

I'm a complete and nervous wreck, as I wait anxiously by the kitchen phone. One week. It's been one week since I sent my application to the community college and still nothing.

Negative thoughts plague me. What if they didn't even read my application? What if they did, will they send an emotionless letter denying my acceptance? My runaway thoughts were pierced by the sharp ringing of the telephone. Wiping my sweaty hands on my jean shorts I answer it.

"Hello?" I stammer.

"Hello, is this the Jaeger residence, if so may I speak with Carley?" a female voice asked. My heart leapt in my throat. "This is she," I announced.

"Hi, Carley, my name is Abigail. I'm calling about your application, and I was wondering if you could shed some light on your probation."

I lick my dry lips nervously. "Of course. What would you like to know?" I asked. She made a thoughtful noise.

"How about you start from the beginning." she suggested gently. A half hour later I finished telling her my story. It was surprisingly easy. The words flowed from my mouth unhindered.

"Alright, thank you for explaining. I'll have a talk with the admission committee. Going on what you told me, it is looking good. I'm sure you'll be attending our college." she says brightly.

Happiness blooms inside me. "Thank you so much," I said as my throat tightened. We said our goodbyes before ending the call. As soon as I set the phone down I burst into tears. Relief envelops me. It feels as if a tremendous weight have been lifted from my shoulders.

I grab a couple kleenex and blow my nose. Letting the news that I had been accepted sink in, I climb to my feet and go in search of mom and dad. I can hardly wait to tell them the good news.