The Last Time

Chapter Two *No More Old Times*

Watching him go away in our car, my heart beats so slowly and I exhaled from a deepest desolation. He called me like everything's fine. But sure I know it isn't. He left me like a cat.

Without any kindness I saw in him when the first time he introduced himself, his insufficient words made every single part of him worst from what I know of him. Mom told me there are lots of fishes. He's not the only one.

That's why I don't cry because that is true. I don't want to deprive myself in a situation I knew it would be over soon since he's the popular one and I'm the strangest girl in this lame town.

I wish I could just escape from this monstrosity cage and will never find someone who's never worth any part of myself. I remember his laugh, his knotty jokes about life and love would never make me laugh. So instead of his beautiful face turns into a withered flower, I would just slant toward him and push my lips to mine. And that will make the jokes good.

I sat on my bed. Thinking about how could he do that. Left me and never answering my calls for three days and he didn't appear in school.

I asked his mom if he's home or not. She told me he was in a friend. I suspect drinking cheap whiskey is his habit now. Not that I'm depraved but that what he likes to drink.

I told him to stop drinking. And he did. I told him to stop smoking. He did. And when he was countering some things I liked to do and telling me stop, I did not.

Which I knew I'm unfair. I'm lying on being a prejudice because of my own things I adore more.

But it's not that what my chosen theories are.

I don't want to cry but I'd missed him. So badly. And it turned out I'm hating him so much like I could hate my father.

I turned off the light and sleep instead of letting my mind meandering through the senseless night. I forced to close my eyes but I saw him in the darkness.

His smile. His unusual different color of his eyes. His hair. His scent that made me drawn to him.

Tears flow down. Like a river. Like a stream.

I wished I could just stay like this. Stay forever still. But life isn't about him.

Like what mom said, even if she hasn't time for me, there are tons of fishes on the water. And I positively think of something else.

I think of Mr. Darcy. I think of Romeo who ended up dead. I can't be the Juliet playing possum and turned out too dead when I found Romeo's demise.

I sleep before mom went in and dives in between a pillow and a duvet.

******

Brennan woke me up. He's the one I felt affected in this break up. He hates Greg and cursing he will kill him when he saw him strolled again in our yard.

Bren had been there for me since he's the eldest, he will protect me as long as he's here for a vacation. Bren's in college and a Berkeley attendant. A runner for suma cum laude but pursuing the highest spot. He drove me to school.

"Don't worry kiddo. When I see him, I'll kick him out. That chicken. I saw him last night but I got no chance to punch him since I'm lodging the attic." He laughed. I smiled a bit.

"I'm not kiddo. So don't call me like I'm in kindergarten."

"So you like Tiana Marie Rose Merriweather? I knew you hate that since," I interrupted him.

"Since mom and dad agreeed to take all the second given names of our ancestor. But when it's too long, mom chose the name. Which is quite alright." I sniff.

"Yep. I forgot you're the old-fashioned girl of Crescent National High School. Yoy should go in a private school like mom told you."

"Bren, we're done here. I'm going to be late. No laters. No buts. No you go girl. Okay?" He smiled and nodded. I faced the school with full strength and eyes weigh on me. I should neglect them and feel unaffected.