Chapter three
“Oh my….Peirce Greyson. What in the world are you doing here? didn’t your race start at eight am? It’s nearly noon.” Patty was hysterically talking to me, all the while fussing at my things, it was worth a laugh, if only I was in the mood.
“Why are you still in the bed? Come on, get up you can still win the race if you start now.” She was now pulling at the warm covers and I let her. After a night of crying and bawling I didn’t have any strength to lift my hand let alone talk.
“What is this, cupcake? I though you loved to swim?” she was confused why I wasn’t at the swim race. And if I were in my right mind I would have been freaking out at missing it but sadly I wasn’t in my right mind and the only thing I could think was what it would be like to be away from all this pitiful life.
“What do you think happens to us after we die?” I voiced my thoughts.
“Why, we come back to life in different body of course.” Patty’s theories of life after death always changed and unfortunately today she chose the answer I didn’t want to hear.
“But I don’t want to come back here again.” If I wasn’t feeling so numb and empty, my answer would have frightened me because I was sounding like a suicidal case, with no emotions whatsoever. And maybe Patty sensed it because she immediately stopped pushing the covers and immediately put her hand on my head for a possible fever. And maybe I had fever, I didn’t know. The only thing I did know was that I had finally had too much and now there was nothing inside me, just me doing essential things to stay alive.
Patty looked weirdly at me, if I didn’t know better I would have thought she looked a little scared….. for me. But when she saw me looking, she just gave me a watery smile and cupped my face into her callous hands. “Breakfast in bed?” the idea sounded appealing, especially when Patty had a no food on bed policy but I wasn’t feeling hungry. I wasn’t feeling anything and it unsettled me.
“I’m not hungry. Maybe later.”
“Where are you going?” Patty sounded on the verge of panic so I tried for a smile, then turned for my closet and took out a fresh pair of jeans, warm shirt, a light sweater and left for the bathroom. Fifteen minutes later I was freshly bathed, my hair still wet but the emptiness hadn’t left. But I left that problem for later. Right now I needed fresh air to think some things through.
“Where are you going Pierce? I called Mr. Hamilton, he said he’ll be here in half an hour.” She sounded funny to me but everything felt funny right now so I just shrugged. “Okay. Wait, why is he coming here?” wasn’t he here just yesterday? And didn’t dad say they had an important client to meet today?
“Uh…so that you aren’t alone. I mean I’ll be working all day and it’s a Sunday and all.” She sounded nervous and I really needed a walk right now. Though the time wasn’t ideal, not to mention that yesterday’s sun was nowhere in sight today, but I really wanted to go out so I didn’t think twice about it. “Well, I’ll meet him after I come back from my walk.” With that I left and started on the trail leading to the road.
I hadn’t realized it but I had been walking towards the South Lake, the same place mom died. During the first days after mom’s death, I used to come here, maybe to seek out answers or simply feel my mother’s presence. But after getting nothing but more questions I had stopped coming here. I had forgotten how beautiful the setting really was.
The lake was a crystal clear liquid body with natural boulders peeking out randomly. The grass and vegetation around the lake was abundant with wild varieties and made a good spot for picnics and scenery sketches. But since it was far away from the mountain trails not many people came here. I took in a deep breath and tasted fresh and sharp cold wave. It was mid-afternoon but the temp was low and my breath easily fogged when exhaling. I chose a random rock to sit on and then pushed my knees under my chin and put my arms around my legs. The scenery was so beautiful that my hands were itching for a pencil and sketch pad but sadly I had stopped sketching long time ago, like I was sure I was going to stop swimming from now on. Here I was, lost and confused and I had no one to go to, no one to have answers or even advise from, lucky me.
