Torn Between Two (CM Punk Love Story)

Chapter 41; Depression

*Alicia POV*

"I'm afraid your baby has no heartbeat," the technician said.

I immediately felt hot and my heart had shattered when she said that.

"What do you mean?" I snapped as tears began streaming down my face. This was my worst nightmare.

"Your baby is gone... I'm so sorry," she said softly. " I need to go get your doctor. I'll be right back."

I began sobbing and I felt Phil grab me and pull me in close. I could hear him crying as well. I've never seen him cry before. I felt myself begin to shake and sob. I couldn't control myself.

I heard a click of the door and saw my doc come in. He looked visibly upset and tried to comfort me.

"I'm terribly sorry," he said as he hugged me.

"Why?" I managed to say in between my fits of sobbing.

"sometimes it just happens. There is no real explanation," he explained.

"What happens now?" Phil asked in a low voice.

"Alicia will need a procedure to remove the fetus. We recommend sedating her so she is unconscious. It is a very unpleasant experience," he said

"When can it be done?" I asked as I continued crying.

"I have a few hours between my next appointment. I can do it now, if you like," my doctor suggested.

I looked at Phil and I saw the pain in his eyes. He nodded at me as if he was giving his approval.

"Yes," I managed to say.

"I will give you a few minutes and when I come back, we will take you for the procedure," he said as he exited the room.

I slumped down into the chair and sobbed. My heart was completely broken. I was so excited for my little Logan to be with us. I had been counting down the days until his arrival in five months.

I felt like my whole world had come crashing down.

"We'll make it through this," Phil said as he held me and ran his fingers through my hair.

"I'm not strong enough," I whispered.

"Yes you are. You are the strongest woman I've ever met," he said.

"It's all my fault," I said, blaming myself.

"Don't you say that. He said it just happens," Phil said.

I heard the door clicks again and I nurse stood there. "Alicia, we're ready for you," she said.

"I love you," Phil said as he kissed me head.

"I love you too," I said softly.

I walked down a long and scary hallway as my mind raced.

*Several hours later*

I awoke after everything with Phil sitting in the room with me. I don't remember anything, and I'm glad. I would have never been able to sleep.

I felt drained and exhausted after the whole experience.

Dr. Richards came into the room and glanced at the clipboard.

"The procedure went well and everything has been taken care of. You can go home now. Please take it easy. No wrestling for a few months," he said.

"Thank you doc," I said somberly as I got up from the table.

Phil shook his hand before the doc left the room. I grabbed my clothes and changed into them before we headed for the exit.

I put on big sunglasses so no one could see my eyes. They were puffy and swollen.

Phil and I walked hand in hand through the parking lot as we were photographed by reporters. I knew I'd have to set the record straight, before they post fabrications.

After a long drive filled with silence and some crying, we got back to my New Jersey house.

"If you want, I'll call your family," phil said sweetly.

"Thanks babe," I said as I headed to my room.

I flopped down on the bed and cried some more. I didnt know that I could produce that many tears.

I knew that I had to do something. As much as I dreaded it, I did it.

I opened up twitter and got ready to set the record straight. I hadn't posted in a week, so this would come as a shock.

I posted;

I wanted you to hear this from me directly and not some tabloid. Our little Logan is now with God and is an angel in heaven. Please respect Phil and I's privacy during this painful and saddening time.

I threw my phone and engulfed myself in blankets and slept for what seemed like forever.

*REVIEWS PLS!

WHAT DO YOU THINK??