Silent Kills

Letter #2: To My Haters

Letter #2: To My Haters

"To be loved on the outside but hated on the inside is one thing. Being hated on the outside but loved on the inside is another."

July 14, 2011

10:17 am Thursday-

10:44 am Thursday

Btw, keep in mind the date that I wrote this. I've been keeping a journal and I haven't been able to upload in a long time so most of these entires are really old. I'll try to upload some new stuff today or tomorrow since I have nothing better to do. Also, leave your comments or ideas for whatever story you want me to work on right now, since I have time. If I don't get any responses, I'll just upload whichever one I feel needs to be updated. Thanks so much for reading and for those who know me, don't take these things personally. This is from a poetic journal and no one will be named, except through general statements or little nicknames I give them to hide their identities. So, don't worry about whether or not I wrote about you. Just read and enjoy! Comment, fave, fan me if you haven't already, and pass to your other friends to get this new story out there. Thanks! LOVE!

Also, not all of these entries are true because I think I'm going to turn this into a novel someday, so if you want, keep a look out for the ones that seem fake and the ones that could be real. You'll be surprised, I assure you.

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Dear Silent Killer,

Is it wrong to say that this past year was a living hell for me? To put the entire year into one big pile of "Life Sucks" and serve it to those who have no idea what it's like to be an outcast? Is it wrong to forget about the moments where some form of microscopic happiness bubbled to the surface, if only for a moment? Is it wrong to think that the people who kept me alive when I was so close to breaking down, are now slipping through my fingers? Do they even  care anymore?

To all my haters, you probably know where this letter is going: straight through to you. I have said these things all throughout my life, as I've encountered the sleazy bitches and dirty-mouthed assholes who tried to ruin my life. But to all of you who have stuck by me through thick and thin, know that their breezy jabs and pointed silence have only made me stronger.

Whenever any of my former "friends" continued to ignore or push me away, I told myself, "Right now it feels like the end of the world. But you'll see. You will be so much stronger." For those of you who don't know, those lines are from the song "Stronger" by Jennette McCurdy. Music has always been my way out when times are hard. I can't make my own but after a long day at school, curling up with my bulky iPod, listening to the sweet sounds of Mae, Taylor Swift, and the ever-influential All Time Low-I instantly feel better.

To all my haters, please know that even after everything I've been through, I can't possibly hate you. No matter what crazy, bloodthirsty thoughts once ran through my head, hatred is one that never crossed my mind.

But just because I can't easily hate, that doesn't mean you can't. "Argue for your limitations and, sure enough, they're yours." The only person holding you back from your endless capabilities...is you. You control who you are, what you believe in. How you feel, how you act towards others. Not me, the girl who always feels your anger and fear rolling down your perfectly tanned skin. I control me. You control you.

Leave me alone. You're better off on your own.

Dream on, followers!

-Loupgaroux13

P.S Love what you don't understand.