Falling Down (Rick Grimes Romance)

Chapter 15

The easiest way to piss a person off is to say the word no. It may only be a two letter word but say no and watch how infants and adults react alike. As commonly as the word is used nobody wants to hear it. The word itself is insulting.

What the fuck did Rick mean when of all possible things he could have wrote he chose such an absurd word as no. Was it even an answer to what I asked him in the lab? Did he mean no there was no other reason than I was the closest thing to a doctor that they had. Did he mean no he had personal reasons for wanting me to stay. For all I know maybe he meant no he didn't want me to stay. Perhaps it was a simple no he wasn't going to talk about it. Then again...what if... just maybe  I was manufacturing what was not there.

Seriously what the fuck was I suppose to do with this. It was like being given a key that you had no idea what it belonged to. Standing there staring at the paper for a great deal longer than I wanted to admit I finally came to a decision. Snagging a pen from my night stand I drew a circle.

If Rick didn't have to make any clear rational sense then neither did I. Two could play at this game. To me the circle was a symbol of the constant tail spin Rick sent me on from the moment I met him. An endless circle of what ifs, maybes and confusion. Screw Rick and the word no.

Folding the note I grabbed my shower fear but detoured to Ricks cell along the way. The hallway was empty as I stepped in front of Ricks cell door. Sitting on his bed Rick seemed lost deep in thought. Hunched forward with his elbows resting on his knees Rick idly clipped and unclipped the latch on his watch as he stared at the floor.

It had been so long since I had seen the inside of Ricks cell. Despite the fact I had no right I instantly scanned the room for signs of Lori. I knew it was irrational jealousy as I looked for a ponytail elastic, hair brush, anything at all I could construe as being Lori's. It was wrong but it still didn't stop me from looking. Clearing my throat I drew Ricks attention, "Hey."

"Hey," sitting up straight Rick latched his watch as he looked at me. His beautiful eyes no longer held anger but something I could quite read. "What's up?"

"You dropped this." Stepping into his cell I held the letter in my outstretched hand. "I thought I would give it back."

A slight smile danced upon Ricks lips as he reached for the letter. Electric bolts danced up my arm as our fingers touch oh so briefly. I wanted nothing more than to linger, to watch Ricks face as he read it. Hell who was I kidding I wanted to crawl into his lap and plant a deep went kiss upon those full sexy lips. I wanted to do that and so much more but real life wasn't about doing what you wanted. It was incredibly hard but I forced myself to leave walking calmly as if I owned the situation.

It was an act I was able to continue to keep portraying later that evening. Dusk was falling as some of us girls decided to go to the roof top to enjoy our coffee. Perching on the ledge of the wall I closed my eyes letting the breeze cool down my over heated skin.

"A perfect end" Sasha sighed stretching her arms above her head, "to a perfect day."

"It was a good day," Maggie smiled as she sat on the lip of a vent. "We found food, medicine and we're all here under one roof."

I caught Maggie's subtle comment about all being under one roof but I didn't bite. It had been a good day and I just wanted to hang onto to it for as long as possible. 

Glancing at all the guard towers I didn't see Rick in any of them. Trying not to come across as a stocker I pretended to just randomly looking over the courtyard. I'd like to say it took me a bit to find Rick but the sad truth was I seemed to have a homing device that dragged me to him.