Half Way From India (On Hold)

Chapter 5

*Author’s note*

I’m so very sorry for the short chapter… I’m just to dang excited for the chapters to come, I’ve almost forgotten about the one I’m writing. Anyhoo… I give you, chapter 5.

Chapter 5

          Not a single one of us talks. We ride in silence to the rhythmic beating of hooves on the hard ground. My veil billows up behind me in the knives of cold air being thrown at us all.

          The thick silence in broken when Suraji asks,

 “Are you cold?”

All he receives is a tired “no,” from me.

          It’s an awful night to be traveling north. I am cold, though I keep all my hurt and doubt hidden with lies. Everything was and is turning into one giant lie. First my mother, then the Emperor, and now me. Lies, lies, lies, and not a single truth. Even this early into my journey I begin to think if finding my father is really worth what everyone has paid. I admit that I don’t know what I’m doing or even where I’m going. Nomadic towns, I think. There are millions of nomadic towns in northern India. I will be withered and thin like paper by the time we are through searching all of them. And if we go too far, we will reach the Qiang (KEE-ang) dynasty of southern China, and the Chaudri family. Emperor Nirav always told me that the Gupta Empire never got along with the neighboring Qiang dynasty. How typical. If we are ever to set foot in Qiang territory we’ll probably be shot on the spot if we’re seen. Gods above I hope my idiot father hasn’t gone that far from Patalimputra.

          I realize how idiotic I was to try and find someone with only a name. How mad it is to be traveling in one of the most unpredictable seasons of the year. Why don’t I ever think? I hate acting on impulse, anger, and adrenaline. But I always seem to act on nothing but those feelings. I want to stop everything. I want to stop time itself, and take just one moment, just one moment to hate myself for what I’m doing to myself and to these other three innocent people.

          I’m just one, small, Indian girl who has never left her palace before now, how am I supposed to find one person in this huge world.

          My self punishment is interrupted by a whinny from one of the horses from behind. I gradually resurface to reality and feel the freezing wind hit me once again.

          Light begins to appear to my right in the east. My hand flies to my eyes to shade my face from the blinding sun. The wind never dies down. If anything, it increases. My free hand and veil become a shield from sand and small pebbles be flung at me and the others.

          “We must stop Lady Shashi!” I hear Neelam scream above the wind. We continue to push through the blowing sand until we are fortunate enough to find a small rock clef in the hills. The clef offers, not much, but some protection from the wind. All four of us dismount our horses, and tie the reigns to any largish rock we can find. We collect our rolled mats and spread them in a circle. We sit, and for the longest time, simply looking at each other. I can tell from looking at each of their eyes that no one knows what we’re doing at. Suraji alternates his gaze from me to the horizon, clearly trying to sort things out. Both Neelam’s and Damodar’s heads are bent, fidgeting with their hands. Smaller breezes blow my black hair over my eyes. I push the loose strands behind my neck with a heaving sigh. Neelam sees an opening, and breaks the ice.

          “Lady Shashi. If I may put it frankly to everyone that we, you in particular, have not the slightest idea were we are to go. My brother and I are not sure where to begin either. But as your servants, we would like to propose an idea, if we may my lady.”