Absolutely Crazy

Chapter 12

I couldn't stop him, after all.

For him, the show must go on at all costs. But that was because he didn't know that doing this would break his heart. He didn't know that he was about to be slapped hard by reality today. And because he wasn't prepared, the least I could do as his best friend was be by his side when he found out that Ryan was really far, far away.

He was already taken.

I sighed as we walked towards Ryan's house. I didn't like this heavy feeling in my heart. It was like I was dreading the whole thing on behalf of Ron. What was I supposed to do when the time came for him to accept the hard truth? I sucked at comforting people. I mean, I could hardly comfort myself when I thought about my own heart problems. This was going to be a big challenge.

As we turned around the corner, we saw a black car going our way. I knew that car. Without any word, I grabbed Ron and dragged him behind the wall of one of the houses. We hid there as the car passed.

"Why are we hiding?" Ron asked.

"That's Ryan's car," I answered. "We don't want him to see us, do we?"

"Oh, right." He followed the car with his eyes. "Where is he going? It's still so early."

"I don't know," I lied. "I guess we should go home now. We don't know when he'll be back."

"No, this is perfect." He smiled brightly at me. "Let's follow him."

I knew he'd say that.

We hailed a cab and instructed the driver to trail Ryan's car. The drive must have been a long one but since I was troubled and engaged in my own thoughts, I hardly noticed the time. I heard Ron ask me questions like, "Do you think he's going to visit a friend?" and "Does he have a part-time job or something?"

My answer was the same: I don't know.

But I did know. And I didn't want to tell him.

"This road leads to the airport," Ron mumbled to himself. "Is he going to pick up a friend? Maybe he's going away for the weekend."

I kept silent.

Ryan finally pulled over and got out of the car. We waited for him to come back. Half an hour later, he came out of the airport clutching a suitcase. A beautiful woman with blonde, wavy hair that fell to her waist walked gracefully beside him. Ron's muscles tensed. The million-dollar question escaped his lips.

"Who is that woman?"

He got the answer right away. The woman linked her arms with Ryan and kissed his cheeks affectionately. Ryan smiled warmly - which was the first time in history - and opened the door for her. She got in the car and Ryan did the same. Pretty soon, they were back on the road. The taxi attempted to follow the car as usual but Ron stopped him.

"Don't," he said weakly. "Don't follow them anymore."

I looked at him and the mere sight of him broke my heart. His expression was one of shock and confusion. I think his mind understood what he just saw, but his heart was trying to ignore logic. I should know. That was exactly what I felt when he told me that he was gay and that was what I was still feeling whenever he was near me.

It was not something you could control. But you could fight it.

"Where do you wanna go now?" The taxi driver asked while looking at us from the rearview mirror.

Ron was in no shape to give instructions. I decided to take matters into my hands.

"Take us home," I said. I gave the address to the driver and he nodded in understanding.

The ride home was quiet. Ron hadn't said a word after that. I was thinking about the things I could say to console him but none came to mind. One of the annoying things about heartbreak was that no amount of consoling words could actually make you feel better unless you were ready to feel better. I could tell that Ron wasn't. He was still processing it. I let him be.

A familiar shop crossed my peripheral vision and I asked the driver to pull over. I got out, walked into the store, and ordered two pints of ice cream. Chocolate and vanilla with honey. I guess we could take both flavors in one pint but that wasn't for me. I mean for us. So I bought two.

When we got home, I told Ron to go ahead and rest in his room while I grabbed the spoons. He didn't argue or agree with me which I found really disturbing because it just showed how down he was. Should I leave him alone? I think that was helpful but... No. He needed someone right now. He was going to succumb to negative feelings if I didn't cheer him up somehow.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a long, auburn wig perched on top of a bald mannequin head. I suddenly felt nostalgic. Looking at it made me think that Ron might have been influenced by that time. It was one crazy thing and it took him a while to recover.

His father used to wear that wig and dress like a woman when he was a kid. No, he wasn't gay. But he had to do it. Ron had an accident before and he kept crying for his mom at the hospital. His mom couldn't come though because she was long gone. She died giving birth to him. Worried about his child's well-being, Robert, his dad, dressed as a woman and pretended to be his mother sent by the heavens. Ron was only two at the time so he fell for it. He found out the truth after three years. It hurt him deeply but he understood his dad and forgave him for deceiving him.

They both had it tough. But they were also tough nuts to crack so they got by. I gave the wig one last look of respect before ascending the stairs.

I found Ron lying on the bed, face down. This was bad.

"Ron?" I lightly nudged him on the side. "I brought ice cream."

He grunted.

"Come on," I coaxed. "You love ice cream and it will make you feel better."

Another grunt.

"If you don't get up, I'll eat all of it."

That seemed to have an effect. He turned his head towards me and gave me a frown.

"I thought you bought that for me," he said.

"Yeah, I did, but if you don't wanna eat it then I will."

He reached for the container. "I never said anything like that."

He began digging in. I smiled as I ate mine straight from the container too.

"Where's your dad?" I figured I might as well start a small talk.

"Work."

"On a Saturday?"

"Yeah, he said they have to finish something."

Silence. What else should we talk about? As I thought, I wasn't cut out for something like this. This felt awkward. It was like we were standing on a thin sheet of ice. Should we talk about Ryan? No, I don't think he wanted to.

"She's beautiful," he murmured as he set the spoon down. "I don't want to admit it but they look perfect."

God, there it was. What was I supposed to say?

"Um, yeah."

Ugh. What a stupid response. I heard Ron sigh.

"I guess this is really pointless," he added.

Again, since I was so smart, I said, "Yeah."

"Do you think they've been together for a long time?"

I stopped eating. "You should stop wondering. It won't change anything anyway."

He laughed humorlessly. "It's not something I can control."

"I know. But you have to try nonetheless."

He glanced at me with an amused expression. "You really don't know how to comfort people, do you?" Then he pinched my nose really hard. "You suck."

I felt the blood rushing to my cheeks. "Well, I'm so sorry for being a sucky friend." And I pinched his nose harder.

He laughed lightly. "You wanna fight?"

I snorted. "Are you seriously asking me that?"

"What's the score?"

"210-209," I said grudgingly. "You're leading. But that's going to change now!"

I set my ice cream on the table and launched myself at him. I knocked the air out of his lungs but he still managed to secure his ice cream. Once his hands were free, he grabbed me by the hips and straddled me on the bed. I smirked at him. He smirked back. Using my knees, I hit his back and he arched. He momentarily lost his grip on me and I used that chance to overthrow him. He landed on the ground flat on his back.

"You have improved," he said with an impressed tone. "But still not enough."

He got back on the bed and our wrestling continued. It was a long struggle. He was pretty strong but I knew that he was only using half of his strength so that he wouldn't hurt me. Meanwhile, I was using my all. We rolled around, kicked the sheets, locked each other's arms, bit one another's ears, all that you could possibly think of. It was a brawl. The fight stopped when I straddled him on the bed and he didn't make an effort to break free. We were both breathing heavily.

"I win," I said triumphantly.

He grinned. "Only because I let you."

I stuck my tongue out. His grin turned into a full-blown laughter. Then when I was about to release him, he grabbed me with both arms and pulled me down to embrace me. My heart leaped a million miles. Butterflies in my stomach went crazy and I closed my eyes in a poor attempt to calm my shit down.

What was this? Why was he hugging me?

I could feel his breath in my hair and it sent shivers all over my body. His warmth seeped through my clothes and with each heartbeat, my soul screamed how much I was loving every minute of this. I wanted to stay in his arms for as long as possible. But my mind said, "No. You're getting your hopes up again."

I knew. I shouldn't be happy about this but I couldn't help it. Screw logic. This didn't happen every day so I enjoyed it to the fullest. With that in my mind, I wrapped my arms around him and held him tight. I could feel his heartbeat against my chest.

"Thank you," he whispered.

I didn't know what he was thanking me for but I replied anyway.

"You're welcome."

We stayed like that for a while. It almost felt like it was never going to end... until we heard the door open loudly. Our heads snapped towards the doorway and we both gasped when we saw who was standing there.

"What's the meaning of this?" Ron's dad asked in shock. His wide eyes were fixed on us and I was well aware of the reason why he was reacting the way he was. From an outsider's point of view, it looked like we were creating a miracle...

Ron and I could only think of one thing to say.

"Crap."