God, Love & All Things Surf

Chapter 7: Seeing Clearly

"So if you start to freak out try closing your eyes and squeeze my hand to let me know. I'll bring you right back up."

Thea nodded. She didn't want to over think it and freak herself out before she even got down there.  She took Max's hand and she dove under with him following.

The goggles she wore gave her a clear view of the underwater world. She automatically looked down. Thea knew what she would see if she looked up but her mind told her she had to look around.

As soon as she did, deep blue filled her vision in every direction and panic swept over her. Without thinking she let go of Max's hand.

With waves pushing her toward the shore she began flailing under the water, disoriented - where was the surface?

Immediately she felt Max pulling her up. Although they were only 5 feet deep, the waves made it difficult for Thea, who was 5 foot 6'', to keep her head above the water.

"Easy, Thea." Max spoke calmly, pulling toward shallower water until she didn't have to fight the waves.

"I didn't mean to let go, I just reacted! Ugh." Her eyes misted over. There was no way she was going to start crying. She snapped the goggles off in frustration and ran her hands through her hair so that her arms hid her face.

"Thea you don't need do that. Look at me." Max said gently. He took her face in his hand. "I'm not going to think any less of you if you cry."

She turned her face away. If she let her stubbornness take over maybe he would give up.

"What made you panic?"

"Too much water."

When it was clear he wasn't going anywhere, Thea turned her face back to him, tear sliding down her already salt-washed cheeks. "It's... like it never ends. It just gets deeper and deeper. I think that's what scares me." She wiped away the trail of tears.

"That's great! Well, no its not, but I mean that's great if you figured it out." Max replied. After a moment's thought he said, "IF you want to try again, try just looking down."

"I am! That's usually what I do when I first dive in the water."

"Good! Then I'm sure it'll work. I want you to keep looking down until you feel like you can look a little farther ahead. But really slowly - even if it means taking multiple dives. Each time you come up try closing your eyes so the depth doesn't bother you."

 When Thea dove in again she willed her eyes to look down. She followed the ripples in the sand, and every piece of rock, coral, or plant that came into view. She hated the urgent need she felt to look up.

"Max hold up." She caught him as they came up for air. Her hands reached for his tall shoulders as a strong wave threatened to pull her away; the surf session had maxed out her muscles. Her boyfriend's caring eyes never left her. "I feel like the prey not the predator when I'm in the open. There's nothing behind me—like on land you might have a group of trees for cover— and I feel like I need to have eyes on either side of my head like a fish so I can see all around me at once." He reached for her waist and held her steady. Probably making sure she wasn't shaking from fear because he was pushing her to challenge herself. "I don't like that there's so much open-ness."

Max took the opportunity to pull her a bit closer. "If I was a 'good Christian'—or even a good boyfriend for that matter, I should probably be tell you to let the Lord be this cover for you."

Where was he going with this? Who is good at being a Christian? "Max-"

"-But," He shrugged. "I'm sinner and based on experience we need to help each other so that one day we can get to that point of being reliant on God."