I'll Survive On My Own (1D)

Chapter Three: School Enrollment

"Why would we be going to school if we're on holiday?" Nick ask's, Anne glances at me.

"Because mum and dad doesn't want you to fall behind everyone in your class, that want yout o be smart" I paced through my answer, stirring the pot of Oat Meal, knowing Nick and Kayla likes eating them in the mornings

"We've been here two days, and you're already talking about sending us off to school" Kayla whines and I split the pot evenly into two bowls.

I placed them down in front of each other and then bent down to Kayal's ear, "Don't want Kye to be smarter than you, do you Kayla?"

Kye, her friend, their enemies too- and he has a crush on her. In other words, a great leverage, "When can we start?" my sister turns to Anne.

"W-well... I can sign you up this afternoon if you like, you too Caitlin" she looks at me cautiously.

"Sure"

~

Walking into the high school with Anne, Nick and Kayla in front of me as I kept my head down, annoyed with the whole walking thing already.

"Hi, can I help you?"

"I'd like to enrol my... niece please" Anne paused, the woman nod's and pull's an pile half an inch thick out onto the counter in front of her.

"Fill this out, here's a pen" she then turns her eyes back to the computer screen in front of her. Anne takes the papers and we go sit at the coffee table.

"Uh..."

Sighing I pulled the paper's towards me, took the pen and started to write in my doctor-like hand writing as I messily filled in all of the needed information.

Anne watched as my brother played on my iPod and my sister on my black berry, "Your writing..."

"My friend's use to say that my writing's messy because i'm smart - which is false"

"Now I wouldn't say that-"

"The test results do" I flipped the pages over and continued in silence.

Writing quickly I continued through the sheet's of paper to the the very end and slid over to Anne, "Sign here" I pointed, she signed, "Here, here, there, on that line there, initials there, phone number there, sign there and there" she finishes and I pulled a tight smile before picking the papers up and walked over to the front desk and put the papers onto the desk.

"There you go"

She nod's and waves her hand at me, "You'll get a call in the next week or so"

"Thanks" I muttered and walked over to Anne and the kids, "Come on" I started to walk out in my dark blue jeans and red sweater.

They followed, my brother and sister chatting in excitement about going to school in England.

"So, are you excited for school?" Anne asked me, trying to keep up with my little legs as I walked quickly to the car, trying to ignore the stares other teenager's gave me.

"Thrilled to go to a prison where i'll suffer from anxiety attacks at the very thought of the hell hole, honestly, I couldn't be more over joyed" catching a quick glance of her shocked expression I hurried towards the car - maybe British people don't get sarcasm based on true fact?

Later:

Stirring the pot of pumpkin soup with one hand I tossed the pasta and other ingredients next to me before I served them up. Putting them in bowls I put four of them on the table along with a bowl of fresh bread in the middle. Taking what little was left of the soup I stole a piece and quickly ate it before calling everyone down. Anne, her husband and my sibling's come down and quickly sit at the table and I make a quick escape, not really wanting to have more interaction with people.

Going into my sibling's room's I cleaned them, laid their clothes out and got their bed's ready.

Running around the up stair's like a mad woman I soon find myself in my own room, on my laptop where I stared at the screen that held a blank word document.

I.... I can't write.... not anymore.

I buried my face into my hand's before I stared the key board and pressed on the key's, crying with the door closed as I started to write about everything.

You never really know where life takes you, it's twists and turns, it's up's and down's are completely wonderful and heart breaking, and no one ever see's it coming. I bet you can't imagine anything happen to your perfect life in a split second, can you? Flipping your hold world around, throwing it into a blender and turn's it on without the lid on top of it. 

What I never thought would happen, what is never what any child think's is going to happen, happens. 

My parent's left the house, never to return again, all because of a drunk driver. And now, this is how it is. 

This is a documentation of my life as the eldest sibling as I try to take care of my little brother and sister in a foreign country, with relative's I didn't know existed, with problems to the very roof of the glass and how I get through it. Though getting through it doesn't seem possible at the moment, everything seem's impossible.

And so, this is how i'm going to make sure my brother and sister are okay when I leave.

I'm not sure how I will yet, maybe by old age, some disease, maybe by my own hand - or maybe even a car crash. Just like my parent's. 

So, let's begin, shall we?

Later: 

Rubbing my eyes I walked out of my room, down the stairs and into the kitchen, only to find Anne and Robin sitting at the table with frowns on their faces, "Umm... is everything okay?"

They looked up and gestured for me to sit down in front of them, doing what they asked I sat down across from them and eyed them warily.

"Where are the kids?"

"Out back, we want to talk to you"

"About what?"

"About you"

Staring at them blankly for a moment I shrugged, "Uh... okay?"

"Is there anything you want to talk to us about?"

"No....?"

"Well, your Nana sent over your medical records and it look's like you've had some quite recent ones and we were wondering if we could know what they're about" Anne pat's the yellow book in front of her and I stared at it, feeling sick.

"What do you want to know?"

"Why you went every week? And-"

"Because they were trying to fix my depression, anxiety, my eczema, panic attack's and OCD. Anything else?" I stared at them, feeling nothing but numbness as I stare back at them.

They stared at me, wide eyed as I leaned back on my chair, waiting for them to reply.

"D-do you have any medication?"

"Of course"

"Do you need refills? Counselling sessions?"

"Yes and no, I don't want to be a bother - i'm a bother even staying here-"

"You aren't a bother" smiling my shaking my head I stood, "Don't worry about me, i'll be fine. I'm always fine"

"C-" I jogged up the stares, ignoring their calling after me as I shut my bedroom door and laid on my bed. 

I'm so tired....

Sighing I rolled over and buried myself under the blankets and tried to go back asleep and stop my thought's and worries.

And soon enough, I fell asleep.