Phil was explaining to Dan what happened and explained how Joey was getting people to beat Phil up and that Phil couldn't take it anymore. He told Dan everything that has happened and immediately felt better after finally telling Dan.
Normally, he would have kept it a secret that he would write on his thighs with his blades but Dan then came into his life and he had someone to tell, someone to talk to again.
"I'm going to talk to Joey." Dan said seeming very upset.
"No," Phil said quickly. "Don't, please. I'll make him stop, I just... I dunno, I broke today."
"I'm still going to talk to him, Phil."
Phil sighed but nodded. He knew he couldn't stop Dan.
They sat in silence, Phil still in Dan's arms, head on his chest. He felt so calm, hearing Dan's heart beat and feeling his warmth. Despite having a break down an hour ago, Dan had managed to make Phil feel okay and it was always going to surprise Phil.
"Where are you parents?" Dan asked quietly.
"They always go out Friday and Saturday nights." Phil muttered. Of course, they were most likely partying; sure, they were warming up to Phil but there was still things they hadn't quit doing for example, leaving at night on the weekends and leaving Phil alone.
"Oh. Did you want to get changed? You can stay at my place so you're not alone. My parents are gone again." Dan said.
Phil nodded again, wondering where Dan's parents were. They always seemed to be gone, it was as if Dan didn't even have parents.
Dan left to let Phil change then left to Dan's house after Phil gathered some clothes.
Phil hadn't realized how late it was that he called until an hour after making it to Dan's place.
"It's three in the morning." Dan mumbled.
"Sorry for calling you really late." Phil apologized only to have Dan sit up and look at Phil.
They were lying on Dan's bed, talking about space when Phil asked what time it was.
"Phil, you could literally call me at four in the morning and I would still answer. I don't care what time it is or why you called. I'll always answer." Dan told Phil as he also sat up.
"I feel like a bother." he admitted.
"You aren't a bother, I promise."
Dan softly pressed his lips onto Phil's. He loved the feeling of kissing Dan. He never realized how much he could love someone until Dan came into his life.
When they broke apart from the kiss, Dan took a deep breath.
"I've never showed anyone and I'm always wearing sweaters and long sleeves..." Dan muttered and Phil knew exactly what Dan was talking about.
"You don't have to-" Phil began to say but Dan shook his head.
"I want to show you. I trust you, okay? I've never trusted anyone like I trust you."
Phil kept quiet and watched a Dan grabbed the hem of his sweater and slowly pulled it over his head.
He wore a black t-shirt underneath and Phil never realized he hadn't seen Dan with anything else but jeans and a sweater.
Dan pulled the sleeves of his arm to reveal scars and cuts scattered all over his arm.
There were some small scratches but then there were long and deep cuts and sadly, there were more deep ones them just small cuts.
Phil didn't know what to do; he'd never been in a situation like this.
"I know it's not a pretty sight. I hate them but continue making them." Dan said quietly, scratching a scar on his wrist.
Phil grabbed Dan's hand in attempt to stop Dan from scratching his arms.
"Scars aren't supposed to be pretty," Phil told Dan in a gentle voice. "But your scars don't define you. I'm glad you trust me and you feel comfortable enough to show me and talk to me about it. Now, I wanna help. Let's keep you clean for as log as possible, alright? You're beautiful, inside and out. Your scars mean nothing. They're scars of the past."
Dan looked at his arms then up at Phil and gave him a small smile.
"Thank you." Dan simply said and Phil have him a smile as well.
"Ok," Phil mumbled. "I'm really insecure but I trust you too."
He let go of Dan's hands and slowly got to his feet.
"Phil, it's o-"
Phil cut Dan off like he had cut Phil off.
"I'm gonna do it. Could you, um, close your eyes or something though?" Phil said and Dan closed his eyes.
He felt his hands become shaky as he unbuttoned his jeans but he wanted to do it. He loved Dan and he trusted Dan.
Phil slipped out of his jeans, his recent cuts still stinging. Goddamn his tight jeans.
"Ok. Open your eyes." Phil said and became even more insecure as Dan opened his eyes which landed at his thighs.
"Doesn't it hurt to put on jeans?" Dan asked.
"It does. A lot." Phil admitted, sitting back down.
He felt insecure but at the same time, comfortable. Phil knew he was most likely always going to be insecure about his body but was also always going to feel comfortable with Dan.
"I'm so sorry." Dan whispered and Phil shook his head.
"No, don't be sorry. Look, starting from now, we're going to try our best to stay for as clean as possible, alright? We're going to do this together." Phil said, taking Dan's hands again.
Dan nodded.
"It's going to be hard, but we can do it." Phil assured Dan.
Phil knew it was going to be hard but he was willing to go through with it if it mean he was helping Dan.
*****
Smol chapter sorry oops ok I hope this was okay I'll try make the next part better! I'm sorry this is boring wOW ok I LOVE YOU ALLLLLLL
BYYEEEE
