Enlightenment

Part 24

When I opened my eyes it was dark in my room. Although my eyes could still see perfectly, everything had a slightly different hue. It surprised me that I had slept through the entire day and most of the night as I guessed it was about three in the morning.

              I listened to the quiet house. To my surprise Jamie was in one of the sitting rooms, I was able to identify his now familiar heartbeat in milliseconds. Anna, David and Julia were all in their rooms but Julia was the only one awake, I could hear her quietly humming along to her ipod. I couldn't locate Chris anywhere.

              I slowly rolled out of bed and resisted the urge to groan. Every inch of me ached and the skin on my hands and wrists still burned. Although at least I could feel some of my wounds healing now. It would take a while for my body to recover from being subjected to that much silver.

              Making my way into my bathroom I saw that I looked as bad, if not worse that I felt in the full length mirror on the wall.

              My eyes had a haunted quality to them; with guilt swimming in their depths they seemed much more sunken and hollow than usual, with purple bags underneath that almost made them look bruised.

              The general lines of my face seemed thinner and sharper than usual, my cheek bones jutting out alarmingly.  My skin was so pale it was almost translucent. I was still wearing the same clothes that were ripped and torn, covered in a mix of my own dried blood and other peoples. Blood stains also coloured my skin and hair which felt dry and stiff.

              Looking away from myself in disgust I climbed straight into the shower. I stayed in their longer than was strictly necessary, letting the hot water flow over my head and fill me with warmth.

              I dressed in some loose fitting jeans and a black vest top so I didn't further irritate the skin on my arms. My hands and wrists were still red and raw, as was the angry wound across my cheek where Clarkson had run my knife. Once I had pulled my hair back into a messy ponytail I felt slightly better.

              I was unable to resist my curiosity as I slunk down the stairs. I had been planning to avoid Jamie but I couldn't stop myself from going to investigate.

              He didn't hear me approach so he jumped violently when I spoke.

"Having trouble sleeping?"

He took a second to answer, "Yes... every time I shut my eyes... I just see his face." He met my eyes. I saw guilt burning there, similar to my own. "He looked so shocked... and betrayed."

I hesitated, not sure how to reply. "It wasn't your fault. He brought it all on his self... he was the one who betrayed you! Not the other way around. He failed to trust you." I sighed. "Although if it was anyone's fault, it was mine. If it wasn't for me-"

He cut me off; "No! It's not your fault what you... what you are. He shouldn't have been so short sighted, and neither should I... before."

I gave him a small smile, "thanks... but I'm still sorry anyway."

He sighed, "So am I..." we lapsed into silence for a few minutes until he changed the subject. "You look... better."

I gave a short laugh, "but still terrible right?"

"Actually you still look beautiful, as always."

              I was shocked but secretly pleased by his bold statement, shallow as it was, although I had no idea how to respond... I smiled nervously before coming to my senses. Smoothing my expression I politely thanked him before making an excuse and leaving rapidly. I found myself in the library at my piano yet again. I brought my feet up onto the bench and wrapped my arms around my legs.