belmonte + hs

monday sept. 16 2013

unedited -

Cassandra and I met three years ago. It was my first year teaching at the school, she made me feel more than welcome. It was her last year in high school, she had been committed to a local university for track. Cassandra was assigned to my TA, teachers' assistant, she wanted to become a teacher when she got older. We spent many hours together; correcting work, planning lessons (sometimes we ate lunch together too). We had amazing chemistry, we were so comfortable around each other. She acted so mature for being only 17 years old, but there was always a sense of a teen in her spirit. Cass had brown eyes that resembled dirt. She had a resting happy face, always had a smile on her face, constantly showing off her slightly coffee stained teeth. Her limbs were lanky, like twigs, making her seem so fragile. Her tresses of yellow hair were always pulled away from her face. Her appearance had potential to be the classic American beauty, but she had all these little peculiarities that made her dissimilar to beauty standards.

Eventually, it was time for her to graduate and days before her last day of school, we spoke to each other about 'us'. Apparently she thought our relationship was much more complicated than I made it out to be. She admitted her attraction for me, but I quickly declined her advances towards a new relationship with her. Cassandra was only 17 at the time (nearly 18, her birthday was a month after graduation), I was 24. Yes, she was an enticing young woman but she was too young for my liking at the time. Cassandra went to college and we parted our ways. She emailed me every once in a while. We always made sure to stay in touch.

Now, she is a senior in college, 21 years old. Legal to drink, to vote, buy cigarettes, legal to be my lover. We became close again over the summer, our relationship has progressed into a very somber one. She stays most nights at my apartment, I can't remember a time before I went to bed without having her thin breathing body lay next to me. I learned to love her quirks. I learned to love someone younger than myself.

Monday was very solemn. I left home late (stayed in bed with Cass too long that morning) and arrived to school right as the first bell rang. I unlocked the door for the students waiting outside my classroom to come in. I stood at the door and shook the hands of each teen who walked into my class. All my students came to class with a grimace on their face, but one. Azra came to class without a trace of the Monday blues in her persona. Her usual scent of cherries and vanilla was masked by the smell of Bath and Body Works perfume that reminded me of public restroom hand soap. I shook her hand, she squeezed my hand and I squeezed hers back.

I looked forward to see her puffy eyes. Her dark eyes looked as if she spent hours rubbing at them. Her outfit today was socks (striped, brown and tan) with sandals (brown), old distressed jeans with too many holes to have any good use, and a t-shirt (yellow with a daisy stitching of the left breast). I adored her winsimcle ensembles, they suited her personality so well.

"Good morning, Miss Belmonte," I greeted her, she let go of my hand and continued to walked in, ignoring my hello. Azra made her way to her desk (the desk next to mine, of course). Last week we switched seats because I was irritated by Reese and Azra talking through my lessons. I kept her seat and Reese across the classroom. I purposely surrounded her with some of the most quiet people in class.

"Mr. Styles, I have to be honest with you," she slurred out of her pretty mouth. I was sat at my desk, every student in class was waiting for my lesson to start, besides Azra. She sat behind her desk with her book bag on her lap. Her chin rested in her hand, as she spoke to me. "You have pretty, large hands," she whispered loud enough only for me to hear. "You know what they say about large hands... Large hands, large coc-" Azra stopped herself from finishing the innapropiate sentence. She stared off in my direction,"Sorry. I don't know why I thought it was okay to say that."  The students around her who heard our conservation quietly laughed, yet I could tell that they weren't surprised something like this was coming out of her mouth.
"May I have a word with you, outside?" I sternly asked her, avoiding trying to make a scene. I quickly shuffled papers around on my desk, handing a pile of worksheets to the nearest student (that wasn't Azra) to pass out to the class, to keep them occupied while I had a talk with Miss Belmonte. Azra's cheeks turned a rosy color out of embarrassment. I walked outside of the classroom and she followed behind me. "Azra, are you high right now?" I bluntly asked. I pieced it together; she was happy on a Monday, was wearing ugly perfume, and was slurring dumb phrases with no control over it. It seemed like it was her first time under the influence.
"Oh, we're on a first name basis now?" She chuckled as she messily poked me in the chest. "Does that mean I get to call you Harry now? 'Cause yes, Mr. Harry Styles, I'm kind of high right now. My mouth is really dry and it's getting hard to talk and you walk me to the water fountain?" She made a wincing face as she attempted to swallow her spit to stop the cotton mouth feeling. Being the generous, laid-back teacher I am, I walked her to the water fountain, but I still had some questions for her.
"You could get into a lot of trouble for being at school like this. I'm going to do you a solid and I'll call your next two classes and tell them you're finishing a test you missed in my class or something, so you can stay in my class while this wears off, okay?" As I said the word 'this' I waved my hands around her stoned little body.

"Okay, okay, thank you, Harry," she spoke as she sipped lapped water into her mouth from the water fountain. She pulled her hair to the side, to stop it from dipping into the water. As she pulled her hair away from her neck, a big purple bruise appeared; a hickey. A love bite from one of the scrawny, Old Spice drenched, immature boys Azra loved to talk to so much. Heat rose to my head, a similar feeling I felt the day Reese and Azra toyed with each other in class. She stood up, wiped her pretty mouth and started walking back towards the classroom. "Let's get back to the class before we get suspicious. The other students might realize you have a crush on me." I nearly snapped back at her, almost taking away my offer for her to stay in my class while she un-baked. I let her flirty comment slide because she was, well, baked. A part of me did feel that I was developing an indecent liking for her, a not so innocent crush, but I couldn't admit that to anyone just yet.