5 second rule....... BULLSHIT!
Whoever came up with that is a fucking idiot! It's just an excuse tramps use to eat off the floor. Look, I don't care if you eat the food you drop on the floor; heck you can eat a buffet off the floor if you want to! Just don't use the '5 second rule' as an excuse! I just don't understand why you'd want to eat it.
I'm not sure if you realize this but, the place you dropped your food was probably covered in dog shit previously. I just want you to think about that the next time you eat something off the floor... Bon Appétit.
I know some of you idiots will try and use the 'starving kids in Africa' excuse to try and justify your eating habits, and it just makes me wonder if the golgothan is jealous that your mouth can produce shits bigger than he is.
How does eating food off the floor help the starving children in Africa? Is your mouth magically linked to their stomachs? Because if it is, how did you do it, and how can I link MY stomach to your mouths? It would save me a shitload of money. If you want to help those children then post them some money! Shit; you can post them your FOOD if you want!
Another thing I don't understand is when people drop their food, why do they blow on it?! Does your breath have some kind of supernatural germ killing abilities? When did they start giving out all these free abilities?!
I guess what I'm trying to say is fuck you, you trampy heffalumps and your 5 second rule!
