Smile On His Lips and Cuts On His Hips (Jalex)

Twenty - Red Starburst

“Alex! Do you have any Starburst?”

Alex gave me a strange look as he adjusted the notebooks he’d just plopped down on the desk next to me, absently riffling through his pencil case and glancing at the clock that was three minutes away from the bell ringing. “No? Why would I have Starburst?”

“I don’t know, but you should,” I responded, sinking into my impressively uncomfortable seat in disappointment. I’d been throwing that question at everybody I’d seen so far that day, desperately hoping that I’d be able to put an end to my intense craving for the candy. May had given me one after getting home yesterday, apparently taken from one of her friends during school, and the citrus sting hadn’t left my tongue since. I wanted more.

The brunette threw me another baffled glance as he shuffled through papers, searching for the homework that was due. I shrugged, spinning a pen through my fingers as the bell shrieked.

___

“You get four downs, and we’re playing touch football, not tackle, ok? So, if you get tagged, that’s one down, and-“ DeGironimo was giving us a chalk talk on football, the next unit we were starting.

I wasn’t listening. It was Friday, lunch was next, I was too exhausted to offer up any energy to listen adequately, I did not care about the logistics of football at all, and Alex was pressed against my side. Which was only a bit distracting, obviously.

There was one of those blue foam mats leaning against the wall of the PE room we were in, and Alex and I immediately plopped down in front of it after our teacher commanded the class to ‘take a seat’. The brunette was, as it seemed, far less concerned with the fact that there was very much only room for one person to lean on it than I was, considering that he simply huffed, pushed at my arm, and scooted right next to me after determining that I had taken up too much of the space.

So he was pressed flat against my side, totally relaxed and peaceful, occasionally tilting his head towards me to whisper something offensive about DeGironimo or make a stupid joke. I, being the totally awkward person that I was, had my muscles uncomfortably locked stiff, completely oblivious to anything besides the body next to me. There was something comforting about it, really, knowing that there was another person right there, someone else who was alive, living in the same fucked up world.

But I was a freak, and had to make a big deal out of everything, huddling in on myself and clasping my fingers tightly around my knees.

Twelve minutes and some basic explanation of the rules of football that I failed to take in later, I finally managed to somewhat relax and let my back slip down the mat, arms falling out of their strict stance to rest more at my sides, left one half on top of Alex’s. Said boy was chuckling at how Josh managed to get hit in the face witha ball had been thrown at him in order to demonstrate proper form as the dressing bell rang, everyone in our class stumbling to their feet at once.

I tried to shake the fuzz out of my legs acquired from sitting still for so long, barely noticing that Alex was still on the floor before attempting to trip my way to the locker room through the slippery snow. He was continuously there, though, ass planted firmly on the fake wood floor, hands held out in front of him as he grinned at me with that dopey smile, head slanted partially to the side, honey hair flopping into his eyes. I sighed, grabbing his hands and hauling him to his feet, spinning around and assuming he’d follow. Alex just giggled, falling into his usual step next to me and fixing his hair. Weird ass, fucking adorable boy.

___

I was stuffing notebooks into my locker three hours later, mumbling to myself about what I’d need to do my weekend homework under my breath. Both my class and homework math notebooks would need to be taken home with me to study for the test we had on Monday, since I could not make getting Fs a thing. I refused to actually fail out of high school, and, wait, the middle of a Dulaney hallway was not to the right place to be thinking about that, but-