Just Hold My Hand

Chapter Sixteen- Charlotte

Charlotte's P.O.V.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was in the car with Karen and Derrek. Karen had spent almost the entire afternoon and most of my evening so far, to prepare me for tonight. Mostly it consisted of what to say to Andrew, how to look at Andrew, and how to act around Andrew. If he compliments, politely smile and thank him, but then look to Drew as a reminder. If he asks me to dance, ask Drew, but make sure he agrees. Then keep a polite distance as we dance. Apparently I am to "leave him wanting more". Whatever that means, I mean what would he want? He has Kathleen.

Regardless, I was told to make tonight perfect. She told me this was my last chance, as if I didn't realize that. Of course it was, this was the best I was ever going to look. If he didn't notice me tonight, then there is no more hope. I'll just have to move on. Now or never.

Drew was planning on showing up a bit later, so I was expecting to just wait inside with the others. I would just have to try my best to ignore Andrew until Drew arrives. I was in the middle of mentally preparing myself for the situation when suddenly, someone had grabbed a hold of my arm. I looked to see it was Karen, and she just shook her head impatiently as she said,

"Where do you think you are going?" I sighed dramatically, trying to get across that I was tired of her games. She ignored my protest and just went on,

"You young lady are waiting right here." I gave her a perplexed look. Why should I? It wasn't like I could avoid Andrew, rather sooner than later right? She again shook her head and released my arm as she delved into her explanation,

"You have to arrive with Drew, Charlotte. Make him wish he was the one bringing you instead of Drew." I thought a moment and unknowingly a grin spread across my face. Never would I have thought to ever stoop to making a boy jealous. It was exciting though. Nerve wrecking too, and against what I believed in, but exhilarating all the same. I was desperate after all.

She joined my grin and I respnded with a brilliant,

"Oh." She rolled her eyes and shook her head once more as she walked off. I just stood there smiling a bit to myself. Then the guilt set in.

This was horrible. I shouldn't do this to Andrew! He didn't deserve this. I was the loser who couldn't take heartbreak, he never intentionally hurt me. I just reacted bad to pain, it was not his fault in anyway! Oh, I should just blow this whole evening off. I shouldn't be stooping to this low level, trying to make a man jealous for my own gain. That just feels dirty. It feels like betrayal too. My love for him is true, so why should I lie and sneak about to tell him? Doesn't seem right, it seems down right hypocritical.

Then again, all is fair in love and war. Maybe that applies to this? Maybe it's just my over active conscience again, making things seem wrong because I have never experienced them before. I was new to all this, maybe it was the norm? I'm not entirely sure. I'll just have to go with it I suppose, too late now. Drew just arrived. Plus when has Karen ever done me wrong?

I stopped thinking about it when Drew approached. A broad and loving smile spread across his face when I came into sight. I blushed, boys often gave me that look, and I always tried to ignore it. I wasn't pretty enough to deserve that sort of admiring look. When boys gave it to me, I often just assumed it was because I was female and their hormones were affecting their judgement. Tonight I wasn't so sure though. Thanks to Karen's sincerity in her compliment earlier. Now I had my doubts.

He came up to me then, still smiling that adoring smile and remarked to me,

"You look great tonight." He embrace me quickly and a bit awkwardly and then proceeded to wrap his arm around my waist. I ignored that feeling, it felt wrong. Nothing like when Andrew and I came into contact. There was no electricity, not sparks. This was just an arm on my person, far too intimately close to be comfortable.