Doors open.

Let you go.

It says it's my feet stopped working. As if my brain couldn't relay the message to keep walking. As if the high that I was just on, the high that I convinced myself to get to, force myself to get to, vanished.

Because there he sat.

Laughing, joking, smiling.

Like nothing was wrong.

Like he didn't just shatter my entire world.

He was sat with Draco and Enzo. Pansy, and Theo nowhere to be found, but I know that they wouldn't be next to him.

I hoped they wouldn't be next to him.

I'm going to assume that nobody told Draco or Enzo what actually went on, because that would open up a new level of hurt.

He was laughing, while I was mustering up all my courage to wake up this morning.

How could he?

How could he feel right sitting there and laughing?

But I just stood there, staring in disbelief.

"Hey! Yn! Over here!" Enzo shouted, waving me over.

I felt a shock run through my feet, begging me to run the other way, and I listened.

How could anyone think I would sit next to him? Associate myself with him? Look at him?

Okay, even if they didn't know what happened in that hallway, they seen the way he treated me at the first dinner back, what did they think it was a joke? That all was well?

I hate this. I hate this because this is a situation I should've never been in! Nothing is going the way it's supposed to go. Merlin, it's our last year, and hands down the worst one yet.

And worst of all? I fucking miss him. Despite his actions, and his words, I miss him. I miss talking to him, his touch, when I heard his laugh it felt like poison on my skin.

Because he used to laugh like that with me.

"Shit, sorry." I'm mumbled, as I accidentally bumped into a student in the hallway.

But I looked up to find Theo.

"what the fuck happened now?" he sounded almost annoyed, like he knew there would be problems today.

"nothing!" I huffed, "Matt's in there, with Enzo and Draco. Usual spot if you wanna join."

"why the fuck would I do that?" He snapped, looking over at Pansy, " take her to the courtyard, by our tree. I'll go grab us breakfast and bring it outside."

"Theo, that's unnecessary they're your friends! Go sit with them I'll live!" I was fighting back tears, and for once doing a good job at it.

"Anyone who could do that to you, is no fucking friend of mine." He turned on his heel, " and wait until Draco and Enzo find out."

I sighed, and drag myself down the hall with Pansy. She didn't speak much. She knew it never helped me. I never needed people to spew me idiotic advice. The usual bullshit everybody tells you when you're going through stuff, " you'll be okay, give it time, you look well!"

She never bored me with it. She knew it was pointless.

Theo on the other hand, always talked to my ear off. He always needed to know my thoughts, I think it's because he was afraid. He was always so afraid of what I would do it myself, ever since we were kids.

When everything with my mom went down, from the very beginning, I always tried to find outlets. Ways to cope with my anger, but they were never healthy, even as a girl.