UNFORGIVENESS

BEST LAID PLANS

🅐🅑🅔🅛

I pedaled away from the clubhouse until my thighs were on fire, tears streaming down my face as I came to the painful realization that my father had deceived me. The emotions swirling inside me were a jumbled mess - I couldn't decide if I was furious or let down. Angry that my mother had chosen freedom over reaching out to me, or disappointed that my father had kept her hidden. Memories of my mother flooded my mind, and despite knowing from a young age that she had killed my grandfather, John, I couldn't push aside the love I still felt for her.

Sometimes, I even dreamt of her, envisioning her teaching me how to play the guitar and singing with a voice that could rival angels. Bobby had always praised her musical talent, claiming she had picked up his old guitar at the tender age of three and never let it go. My father would simply smile and nod whenever they reminisced about my mother's childhood and teenage years, never shutting them down despite the unspoken rules of the club.

The atmosphere in the room would shift as soon as my grandmother entered, scolding Bobby and Uncle Koa like misbehaving children and berating them for mentioning the devil herself. Everyone obeyed her command to avoid speaking of my mother, and it would be months before Bobby would dare to bring her up again. I understood why my grandmother despised my mother, she took the love of her life from her.

Gemma had stepped in to help raise me when my father was preoccupied with club matters or on runs, taking me to school and cheering me on at sports games. But when it wasn't Gemma, it was my dad who filled my days. Jackson Teller had always been a loving father, treating me with honesty and respect. As I grew older, he revealed more about the club's activities and the criminal world they were entangled in. He shared what he knew about my mother, emphasizing that he hadn't spoken to her since the night she was arrested for shooting John. He never showed up at her court hearing. Dad had adored Mom wholeheartedly, a fact known to everyone in town, yet now it seems like he despises her enough to start lying to his only son.

I tossed my bike onto the driveway and hurried into the house, I proceeded to my room and eagerly tore open the box on my dresser that held my savings. Grabbing the cash, I swiftly stashed it in my pocket. Moving on, I entered my dad's room and unlocked the hidden compartment in his nightstand drawer, a secret I had always known but never dared to explore out of respect for him. Inside, I discovered what I had been seeking: the letter from the parole board containing my mother's address. Slipping it into my backpack, I made my way out of the bedroom and down the hallway. As I glanced around, my eyes fell upon the bottle of Jack D on the kitchen counter. Without hesitation, I added it to my bag. With everything in place, I left the house and headed towards the bus stop, ready to catch the bus to Stockton. I was going to see my Mother. As the bus drove the two-hour drive to Stockton, I took sips of the liquor hidden in my backpack.

My feet hit the pavement in Stockton, and my legs felt heavy. I glanced around the unfamiliar street looking for the sign for Chinatown, finding it I headed in that direction, as I walked my brain felt like it had come loose and it was rattling around in my skull the feeling threw all of my senses off making the whole city out of focus. I guess I was drunk and I was glad as it numbed the pain and any doubt about what I was doing. Turning a corner I found myself on the corner of Chinatown and looked at the street signs above me for my mom's halfway house, it was across the street. The building was old and falling apart with an alleyway to the side, I glanced around and took a deep breath to build up the courage to cross over and enter the building, and that's when I saw Unser sitting in his banged-up truck.

"Shit," I muttered to myself. I would have to wait for the old man to leave. I knew someone from the club had put him on watch, probably my Grandma, and if he saw me here the whole club would be here in no time, spoiling my plan. I leaned against a wall and waited, examining the faces of every woman who left the front entrance of the building. I watched for a long time and Unser never moved. It was getting late so I sat down in a shop doorway for the night, surely Unser had to leave soon. I watched the people come and go and finished my dad's bottle of Jack Daniels, making me so drunk I was struggling to keep my eyes open, it was early morning now and I had been here all night just hoping to see mom come out of the building. I stared at Unser's truck with hatred at the old man still being there as my eyelids grew heavier.

I jumped up and looked around my surroundings confused, I had fallen asleep, looking at my watch it had only been half an hour and I was still drunk, I looked to where Unser was parked and let out a low growl. The stubborn old mule was still there. I studied him and noticed he looked pissed off and a little uncomfortable. Good, maybe he's getting fed up and will leave soon.

I felt the back of my head where it was throbbing with no blood, I guessed the pounding in my skull must be from the alcohol. I pulled myself up and held on to a lamppost as the street swayed. It started to rain and my hair was starting to stick to my face, I steadied myself on the lampost as I pulled my hood over my head the dampness making my clothes sodden I clenched my jaw to keep from shivering.

Hearing a loud bang I looked over my shoulder in the direction of the sound and noticed the fire exit door That someone had gone into, with a fire escape leading up to it, I had been so focused on the front door I hadn't seen it before now and I decided that that was my way in. I took a few steps and went down the alleyway towards the metal stairs when I heard the growl of a bike engine behide me revving its motor before falling into a smooth rumble, it began to idle behide me, I walked faster toward the stairs without looking over my shoulder I didn't want to see the rider, scared of who it might be. My fingers touched the metal of the fire escape and I let out a breath of relief that whoever was behide me had not come for me, That was short-lived as I took my foot and placed it down on the first step, a strong hand landed on my shoulder to halt me and I looked up to see the silhouette of my Mothers brother.

"Where do you think you're going young buck?."

I tried to pull away and carry on up the stairs, but Koa was a big guy and the more I pulled forward the more he held his grip on my shoulder.

"Let go, I want to see her!" I slurred. Koa eyed me with a smirk.

"Not today. Get on the bike, I hope you can ride you little shit."

I wriggled more. "I'm not asking," Koa said as he pulled me towards him and picked me up over his shoulder before striding to his parked bike and placing me on it.

"What the hell was you thinking, eh?" He shook his head at me as he dug into his pocket for his cell he looked at me with a smirk amused no doubt by my drunken state as he waited for my father to pick up on the other end.

"I've found Abel Brother."

I let out a defeated sigh as my face went warm and my mouth dry suddenly without warning I heaved and the vomit flew out of my mouth towards my uncle, the Amber liquid splatting his favorite biker boots. My eyes were wide as my head spun.

"Sorry man." I hiccupped.