My Journey to Kill the Doctor.

My Secret

River's prospective

*I was sitting at my desk inspecting the poor wrap job the Archeology Office nurse did on my arm and as I do I hear someone say.*

Y/N- How's your arm? Do hope I didn't cut it to bad... Sorry about that Sweetie.

*I jumped at the sudden noise and I looked up to see Y/N Still unsure of what to think of her because of the last time we spoke. But her tone of voice was so Sincere*

River- Oh my arm? It's fine. It doesn't hurt anymore. In fact.. it's fine I was just about to take the bandages off.

Y/N- River don't lie to me Love. Let me see it.

*y/n reached out her arms to me waiting for me to approve her approach. She could very clearly tell I was lying. That's not an easy thing to know. I'm a very good liar she's not telling me all she knows.*

River- Damn. You really know all about me.. um. Yes I suppose so..

*I held up my arm for her to look at she could tell I was reluctant.  Y/N inspects my bandage and slowly unwrapped it to get a better look. She looked at me like she was starring into my soul. In that moment it was like a moment of recognition. There was something very familiar about her. In that moment I trusted her completely and I felt my whole body relax.*

Y/N- Do you trust me?

River- Strangely... yes.

*I don't know why she did what she did next but after I told her I trusted her she took my arm and held it with bother her hands and my cut started to glow.*

River- How. I don't. You? But.

*I was completely speechless I couldn't get a full sentence out. Her hands still on my arm Healing me with Regeneration magic. I was only able to speak when she was done*

Y/N- There you go. How's that?

River- how did you? Why did you? You have Regenerative abilities? How?

Y/N- it's thanks to some Experiments that the Silence did on me as a child. Regeneration.. Similar to you had before you foolishly healed the Doctor.

River- I didn't foolishly heal the doctor! I healed him because he's my friend!

*the trust was gone now. I was standing up at this point Defending the Doctor through words. If I could convince her that the doctor is a good man like he and my parents did for me.*

River- The Doct-

Y/N- let me stop you right there. Your not going to convince me he's a good man... Because I know he is a good man.

*well I have to admit she certainly knew how to shut me up. She had my full attention.*

Y/N- the Doctor is a good man. He helps people and Saves worlds. Specifically Earth. Like every moment of every day. But he also Does a lot of bad. Most of the people who travel with him end up with No memory of him Or Dead.

*I couldn't disagree she was right. It hurt to admit it but she was.*

Y/N- the doctor is a great man and he dose great things. Trust me I know Everything there is to know about the doctor. And everything about you. And like you River. I was given the gift to regenerate. But every Gift comes with a Curse.. River I don't want to kill the doctor. But I have to. They have ways to make me finish the job. I even if it's the last thing I do. I have to kill the doctor... Or die Trying.

*a tear fell from her face as she finished speaking. I wanted to ask but I didn't want to intrude.*

River- and.. if you don't Succeed? How will they punish you for failing?

Y/N- if I fail? Ha. If I fail they will torture me.

*y/n took a moment to pause before finishing. It was clear this was hard for her to say whatever it was*

Y/N-... and they will kill you.

*my eyes widened in shock Why would they kill me if she failed?!?  I wanted to ask but she was making her way quickly through the door I only had time for one more question so I blurted*

River- And if you succeed? What prize do you get if you succeed?!

Y/N- ...if I succeed? River if I succeed then they bring back Your memories of us, of... me.

*I don't know why but at that point I felt a tear slowly roll down my face. I don't know why I was sad when she said that. But something about it hurt.*

Y/N- river you don't remember this but we love each other. We always have. Since we were kids... we grew up together. We've known each other our whole life's. But they took them. Your memories of me. Of us...

*now we were both crying just a little bit wasn't much. Because psychopaths don't cry all that often but it was there. We were both crying just without tears.*

Y/N- River I have to go. If they find out I'm here. If they know this happened...

*she exited before finishing. I knew what she meant. Although I couldn't let her leave I needed to know more i was so confused. My memories? What was she talking about?! I mean yes there was a similarity to her but... if I knew her my whole life growing up then it would feel like something was missing... although. Now that I think about it*