I guess I'm doin' this. These are gonna be little things that I guess come from my twisted ass imagination. This is the first time I've ever written or done anything like it so bear with me on this. There's gonna be swearing, drugs, drinking, and lo...
So y'all know how I said I go to Wednesday night church?
Well. I went there last night with my friend. The way this place is built, there's a Children's Ministry, a Middle School Building, and a High School Building. I usually go to the Middle School Building, cause I'm in 7th grade. But yesterday, I went to the High School Building with my friend cause her older brother was there, and she wanted to say hi before we had to go to the worship center. So we walked over, and we were all talking for a bit.
So. I looked around at all the older kids there, and I saw someone out of the corner of my eye. There was this young dude, shoulder-length brown hair, and he was wearing a FUCKING KISS DESTROYER '76 SHIRT. I pointed to my friend, and said, "Do you know who he is?" She said no, but she started doing the UNTHINKABLE. SHE STARTED ASKING RANDOM HIGH SCHOOLERS WHO HE WAS, CAUSE SHE WAS CONVINCED I JUST MET MY FUCKING SOULMATE. Questions like, what's his name, how old he is, does he really like KISS, and stuff like that. Apparently his name is Luke, we don't know how old he is, and no one knew for sure if he liked KISS, no one there has even HEARD of them which is a fucking disgrace. (She also took some pictures of him even though I TOLD HER NOT TOOOOO)
So, after a while of me staring at him like a creep, we left and went back to our building for the regular stuff that takes place there.
After that was all done, and the kids were running around like maniacs waiting for their parents to pick them up, my two friends decided to go back to the High School Building. I didn't see the KISS shirt dude, or his friends, so I just figured they left.
So, apparently there's this game called 4-Square. I've never played it. But both my 2 friends and all the other high school girls there have. So they dragged me into their game so I could play with them, which was nice, but a mistake. I didn't know ANY of the fucking rules, which meant I was asking my friends what the hell I had to do to play the most basic school game known to them. I couldn't hear shit, so I had to ask them to repeat what they were saying multiple times, and I was still getting everything wrong. Those poor high school girls were looking at me with a mixed look of sympathy and disgust. After struggling for a while, guess who I see walk out of a room next to me?
THE DUDE WITH THE KISS SHIRT AND ALL HIS FRIENDS.
So then MY friend, (bless her soul) decided to say the fucking worst thing she could've said right then and there...
"Hey Abby, look, it's him!"
...
WHY. FIRST OF ALL, YOU'RE PUTTING ME ON THE FUCKING SPOT. NOW I HAVE TO COME UP WITH SOMETHING AWKWARD TO SAY WITH NO PREPARATION.
SECOND OF ALL, that kid's probably goin', "The hell does she mean, 'that's him?' were they talking about me?" I KNOW THAT'S WHAT I WOULD THINK IF SOME COMPLETE STRANGER SAID TO THEIR FRIEND, "HEY LOOK, IT'S HER"😭
So after what felt like an awkward fucking minute, I stuttered out,
"So uh.... Do you like KISS?"
HE SAID YES. WHICH I WASN'T EXPECTING, I WAS EXPECTING HIM TO SAY, NO I JUST LIKE THE SHIRT, OR SOME SHIT LIKE THAT😭😭😭
SO I DIDN'T HAVE AN ANSWER. I FROZE. And after what felt like a fucking HOUR, I just nodded my head and mumbled, "Cool, cool."
Guess what somehow made this first impression even worse?
HIM AND HIS BUDDIES DECIDED TO JOIN OUR SHITTY 4-SQUARE GAME.
SO NEXT THING I KNOW, IT'S MY TURN TO SERVE THE BALL, AND I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF ABOUT 30 HIGHSCHOOL GIRLS AND BOYS WHO ARE WAITING ON ME TO DO SOMETHING, I DON'T KNOW THE RULES, MY HAIR'S A MESS, MY MAKEUP IS TRASHY AND SLUTTY AND PROBABLY SMEARED ALL OVER MY FACE, MY BIG ASS DANGLEY EARRINGS ARE TANGLED UP IN MY HAIRSPRAY CRUSTY HAIR, MY SHORT JEAN SHORTS ARE RIDING UP MY ASS AND THE BANDANNAS ON MY LEGS ARE FALLING OFF. I'M NOT HEARING ANYTHING MY FRIENDS ARE SAYING CAUSE THE BLOOD IS RUSHING AROUND IN MY BRAIN CLOUDING MY THOUGHTS AND I JUST FROZE.
I gave up, threw the ball in the air, and said, "I don't understand anything, y'all have your fun."
I walked over to the bench a few feet away from them as they continued their game. My friend went and sat next to me and we started talking. She was trying to convince me that I looked beautiful, and not like a rotten potato that stumbled into a mud pit.
I still don't believe her though.
After a while, my mom texted saying her and my dad were outside to pick me and my brother up. But I forgot, my phone's messages don't work. So I realized this was minutes late, I'm not in my usual building, and I was probably keeping up traffic as they waited for me. So I shot up in my seat, almost yelled "shit," but saved myself by yelling "shoot" instead.
I guess I stood up at the wrong time.
As soon as a took a step forward, the ball they were using to play 4-Square with clocked me directly in the side of my face. In. Front. Of. 50. Fucking. People. And. That. Kid.
I can't tell what I heard them say. I heard a bunch of yelling and saw everyone staring at me when it happened. Were they laughing? Booing? Apologizing? I don't know. But that ball came full speed ahead right at my damn face. In front of the kid with the KISS shirt.
I wanted to make a good first impression. Fuck the fact that he was cute, I just want dude friends who like the same type of music as me. I don't wanna date. He seemed cool. And I blew it. I'm not even embarrassed, I don't get embarrassed easily. I'm just mad at myself at the screw up I did. Now, the only thing that kid is gonna remember me by is being awkward as fuck, and getting hit in the face with a ball. I don't even know who threw it. Maybe it was on purpose? Probably, idk.
You wanna know the weird thing? I was gonna wear a KISS shirt yesterday. Would things have gone better if I did? Worse? I don't know. I think I have bad luck with kids wearing KISS shirts. One time, I was at a birthday party, and there was this girl with a KISS shirt that I wanted to talk to, and I ALSO made a complete fool of myself then. I'm not even gonna begin to try and explain that, that's a whole different chapters worth of bullshit. But this was worse. This was WAYYYY worse.
And next week is Spring Break. I don't even think I have church next Wednesday.
