Life.

Nothing

I can't feel anything anymore.
Nothing. I can't feel pain, neither love or joy.
Nothing.
No smile across my face and no thought in my brain. Nothing. It's quiet. Quieter than it has ever been before. I know I'm not okay but it's fine. As long as I just feel numb. As long as I just feel nothing inside of my veins. Nothing. Just like me. I am nothing. I am just one of billions of people on this floating rock. I mean nothing. I am nothing.
I have accepted that I am worthless and that I am just me. I have accepted that it's hard to love nothing. I have accepted that it's hard to look at nothing. I have accepted that it's hard to speak or listen to nothing. But the nothing what I mean is me. I am the nothing. I can't feel anything. Not how my eyes shut or how my stomach goes up and down and up and down nothing. It's peaceful to feel nothing and numb. Then I can't get hurt by you again. You who called me ugly. You who bullied me into thinking I'm nothing. You who made even my closest friends against me. You who knew that I am struggling but still called me names. You who left me because I wasn't flattering enough. You who has scarred me for the rest of my life. You who I miss. You who I still love.