To Put On An Act [bxb]

Chapter 21 - drunk and dazed

content warning: underage drinking

To be absolutely clear, there'd been many reasons for Youngbin to stay up late this Saturday night.

One of them was because he'd still have to work on that biology presentation that he'd been dreading. Though he'd already agreed that Kaya would take over the visual and creative stuff, Youngbin was responsible for research, fact checking, writing detailed enough notes for Kaya to condense them into nice little bullet points.

Another reason was that his sleep schedule had been so awfully messed up that sleeping before midnight, or even daring to get ready for bed, just felt too impossible. And it wasn't midnight just yet.

There was, of course, potentially, another reason. Youngbin had been checking his phone every ten minutes since seven pm sharp, since Alex arrived at the party at Min's place. He'd promised to text every now and then, promised to stay out of trouble, to stay safe, to behave and reach out if something was wrong.

Now he hadn't texted in four hours. Which, of course, could've meant something good, that he was having a nice civilised time with his friends with nothing wrong, and he just got caught up in drinking various non-alcoholic beverages that he'd forgotten to tell Youngbin he was okay.

Or, alternatively, he was absolutely not doing that at all.

Youngbin could obviously just text him and ask. Just to get a quick update. Something like "hey, everything alright still?" or maybe "how's the party" or "hope you're having fun!" but- Did he even have a right to do that? Was that controlling, to sit at one's desk and check one's phone like some sort of freak instead of getting something done? Was that weird boyfriend behaviour?

It wasn't boyfriend behaviour at all, really, because they weren't boyfriends, but maybe it was just weird friend behaviour. Not that the exact term mattered much, because in the end, it was just weird. Or too controlling. Or too motherly.

Youngbin tapped the space key on his tablet, a habit he'd learned, when he didn't have anything to write down, just push any key so he would keep his hands occupied and stay in the flow. Problem was, the entire file that was supposed to be for notes on his presentation was just empty spaces now.

He knew that nothing wasn't going to come to his mind now. Not when his mind was all used up by worrying about Alex.

What even was there to worry about? He wasn't some child. He drank and did other stuff sometimes, apparently, and that was a normal thing to do. He was 19. He was mature enough to have his own apartment. He'd promised to take care of himself. There was absolutely nothing to worry about, and yet, Youngbin couldn't help but- Well, worry.

Alex wasn't exactly the most stable lately. There was something about him, his eyes, his expressions. Youngbin had absolutely no idea what it was. But it was wrong. And on top of that, his hand was still bandaged, his face still looked a bit rough, the wounds on his lips and cheeks hadn't quite healed yet.

What if he got hurt? Again? What if he hurt someone? Or himself? By now, the entire school had learned about what had happened between Alex and Dennis. Was there a possibility for him to be there as well? Would someone see a drunken Alex as a challenge?

Youngbin groaned, his thoughts making him go absolutely insane. There was no need to feel like this. Everything was fine. Everything was going to be fine.

He's just out partying. He's got his friends around. It's just a party.

Though, the fact that Youngbin had actually never been to a party didn't help his paranoia. He'd seen and read and heard plenty of those oh so dreaded teenage house parties. From shows, mostly, and he knew well that he probably shouldn't believe Euphoria to be an accurate representation of parties, or of being a highschooler in general. But still. Still.