Music From The Deep

Alone Too Long

Mare stared at the cave wall, eels drifting above her and Sedrick asleep behind. She lay there for a long time, before slowly rising and slipping out of the eel cave. And the first thing she did was dive.

As she dove a presence appeared near her tail. She turned her head to find the largest of the eels following her, Ichiro.

Neyen wanted me to follow. Ichiro hissed.

Of course, I understand.

They both swam down together in silence.

Sleepless?

Yes, I... I don't know why.

Something with strange male?

I suppose... he shouldn't be here. He is a land dweller, not deep sea.

Change back?

I don't know how.

Mare stopped against the ocean trench, hand brushing the jagged stone. Why was she diving so deep? Perhaps this was just whatever she did whenever she needed to think. After all, she was never tied to any specific place. She started to swim back down again, Ichiro at her tail.

She was alone.

The realization brought her up short. She had known this, obviously. It had always been the case since she left her pod. She flinched a little as she thought of her old pod, cringing away from the memory of too bright light being flashed into her eyes. Of a painful shock running through her body.

Alone was good, alone was safe.

Find someone to change him back?

Mare turned to look at Ichiro. She didn't want to find anyone else. She didn't like that. The thought made her want to dive to the bottom of the ocean and never return to see the light again.

No looking for others. I will return him to his homeland, but then I will no longer follow him. He is not of this place.

No mate then?

No! No mate. He is not of here. I do not want a mate. Alone is good. Alone is safe.

Alone is sad. Ichiro responded. Deep is dark and cold. Alone for too long, lose yourself.

Mare didn't respond, just started to swim again. The big eel continued to follow, but his movements were more sluggish, as though he were being held by a tether that he was straining against.

The deep sea Mer stopped, looking back at Ichiro.

How long have I been alone? She asked slowly, almost dreading to hear the answer.

Very long time, you came to my swarm before Sanbi and Neyen, before Alook sank.

Mare had forgotten about Alook. She remembered the ancient eel though, remembered grieving with the swarm when Alook had finally stopped swimming, their body sinking to the darkest part of the ocean.

Alone too long. He repeated again, starting to swim up a little. Keep with strange male. Maybe he will not want to change back.

He has a swarm. A swarm I stole him from.

Not meaning to. He seems to understand.

He wants to return to the surface. Mare repeated, remembering how his face had changed when he had seen the sun again. A sun that made her eyes flow with tears of ink that she could not control. She projected the image of Sedrick's face to Ichiro, with it the feeling of sorrow she felt at not being able to enjoy it like the former land dweller could. He cannot live as I can. Not in the deep.

It took a very long time for Ichiro to respond. And when he did, he did not bother to dissuade her arguments any longer.

Back to the cave, return to the swarm and sleep.

Mare didn't bother to argue, just followed the eel as he returned to his cave and his swarm. He floated just outside of the mouth of the cave as Mare squeezed into the safe confines of stone, before following her.

The Mer curled up into the corner of the cave, pulling her tail up near her face when Ichiro butted his head against her back. She twisted away from him, confused as to what he was doing. He continued to push her toward where Sedrick slept sprawled on his back.

She floated near him, confused as to what the eel was getting at. He then swam to Neyen and brushed her side, eyes fixed on Mare, before looking at Sedrick. The look was clear. Rest with him.

Timidly, Mare let herself sink to the cave floor beside Sedrick, who did not move an inch as she laid beside him, tail curled around herself. He was warm beside her and in his sleep he tossed an arm over her shoulder.

It was not unpleasant, just made Mare stop breathing for a moment. She stayed deathly still, listening to the steady beating of Sedrick's heart and felt his chest rise and fall with his breathing. The natural symphony of it slowly lulled Mare to sleep.

It was the first time she had slept easily in a very long time.