Ten: The Many Days Later

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𝘚𝘶𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘷𝘦: 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘦𝘹𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘰𝘧 (𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘭).
-

It's quiet when I wake up. It takes a few minutes for my eyes to adjust to the light before I can see clearly. I'm in a big, white room with two chairs beside the bed, which I'm laying in, and there are tubes and wires connected to me. I start to take them off but stop as someone walks into the room.

"Oh, you're awake." A tall man with balding gray hair says, nonchalantly.

I try talk but can't.

"Don't be startled, that's just your breathing tube. We can remove it now, but we need to be sure that your heart rate doesn't accelerate. Any further, that is."

I look down and see the tube sticking out of my mouth. I didn't even notice it at first and now I can feel it. I almost want to throw up.

"Mickey?" Someone else's voice comes outside the room. In walks Ian Gallagher. I feel my heart stop for a few seconds when I see him. I can't even say anything. "Mickey..." he says my name again.

Wait.. he says my name? Now, I know that my heart stops. It stops and then starts going at a thousand miles per hour. Ian walks closer to me and some machine starts beeping.

"That's not good.." The doctor says, making my heart beat even faster. "I may have to ask you to leave."

"What?! But why?" Ian complains, and I'm so happy to hear his voice. I'm almost surprised I remember him. It feels like I was supposed to forget everything. It feels like I did but I somehow remember him.

"His heart rate is too high!" The doctor frantically searches around the room and two nurses walk in.

I look up at Ian, a frown on his freckled face and sadness in his eyes. He starts to leave but I grab him by the hand and stop him.

"We need to calm him down. Sedate him or something! And, you, you have to leave!" Everyone's rushing Ian out but I won't let go of his hand.

"I can't.." Ian says, "he wants me to stay." He then turns to me, "Mickey, you have to calm down. Just breathe. I'm here, you know? I have been this entire time."

I close my eyes and focus on my breathing. Everything is dark.. and quiet. This is all I saw and heard for a month. I thought I was dead. I could feel it, somehow.. I felt myself falling.. but I didn't die.

The beeping slows until it's back to normal. I open my eyes and look back up at Ian. I feel the sudden urge to apologize to him but I can't.

"It's okay." He says, anyway, like he knows. He sits in the chair next to my bed, still holding my hand, and smiles at me. "I'm sorry."

I look confused.

"I should have been there, before you even thought about jumping but I wasn't. I barely made it."

But you made it. I want to say. You saved me, Ian.

We both go quiet. Seconds pass and my eyelids are heavy so I decide to close them. I'm suddenly sleepy so I decide to go to go sleep.

-

This time, when I wake up, the first person I search for is Ian. He isn't right next to me like he was when I went to sleep. I mindlessly sit up, realizing that I can, and get out of bed.

A nurse rushes into the room. "Please, have a seat."

"Where is he?" I ask, my voice quiet and raspy. They removed the tube.

"It's late, no visitors are allowed at this time." The nurse says.

"But I need to see him." I tell her, clearing my throat.

"You can always make a call." She offers and I'm desperate enough to take her up on it. She leads me out of the room to a desk in the front where there's a phone.

What am I thinking? I don't even know his number. "Shit!" I exclaim. I'm so angry. Everything that's ever gone wrong hits me and I break down.

"Sir, are you alright?" The front desk lady asks.

"I tried to kill myself." I tell her, tears streaming down my cheeks.

"Well, I'm very glad you're alive now. Aren't you glad?"

Aren't I glad? I go back to my room and lay down, deciding to think about it as I go to sleep.

-

This time, I wake up but don't open my eyes. I just lay there in the darkness and tears unknowingly make their way out.

"Mickey?" Someone calls my name.

I jump up, expecting to see Ian but I don't. It's Mandy. She looks a lot different. Her hair is cut short to her shoulders and her blue eyes are almost gray.

"Oh, Mick.." she runs to me, falling to her knees by the bed.

"Mandy." I say to her.

"I didn't actually want you to leave. I didn't want you to go, I swear. I'm so sorry." She sobs in front of me but I can't find the strength to comfort her. Instead, I begin to cry too.

"Can you get him for me?" I ask.

She looks at me, confused. "Get who?"

"Ian." I state.

She takes a deep breath and wipes her face. "Okay, yeah. I can get him. But, you make sure to get some rest, okay? I'll be back."

I nod and close my eyes.

-

This time, I wake up to a voice too hard to ignore. My eyes shoot open, darting around the room, searching for him, and when I realize he isn't in the room, I get up and leave to find him.

"Mickey?" He says once he sees me. He's standing by the front desk.

"Ian?" I reply.

We both walk over to each other. Ian tightly wraps his arms around me and I do the same to him.

"Ian, I love you." I say with no regrets. The words fall out of my mouth so smoothly.

"I love you first." He says and I can see the smile on his face without even actually seeing it. "Don't you wanna know how I'm talking again?"

I bury my face in his shirt, my words muffled when I talk, "No. I'm just happy you're here. I'm so happy."

We pull away from each other and I see his face again, one thing I'll never get tired of. One thing I'll never be angry at.

"I'm really happy, too." He says.

"Thank you for saving me." I mention.

He backs away and looks me in the eyes. His eyes are green and I've never had a favorite color before, nor cared enough to find one, but looking at him, I know that he's my favorite color. A color of everything good, everything happy.

"You saved me first, anyway." He says after a while.

"So call it even?" I joke.

"Yeah, let's call it even." He kisses me and everything goes quiet. The rest of the world fades from view but my entire world is right in front of me. His name is Ian Gallagher and he saved me.

-

Mickey: I am glad to be alive.

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