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. then .
I would have never thought myself to be someone to be left at the altar, much less the one doing the leaving. This unfortunate thought was the only one on my mind as I gathered the bottom of my dress and hurried down the steps of the church; my fiancé waiting for me inside. I quickly opened the door to the car that my brother had pulled around the front, just in case I changed my mind. I ripped off my veil, not caring that it ruined my hair. I sat in the driver's seat for just a moment to catch my breath and come to terms with what was happening. I turned to look towards the doors and began to panic as I saw them fly open. I started the car, but curiosity took hold before I could force myself to drive away. I turned to look back. His worried eyes standing at the doors, surrounded by our families would forever be burned into my memory. As he took his first step in descending the stairs, I couldn't help but let out the tears I was doing my best to hold back. Commitment was something I was very ready for, but I couldn't do this to him. Somewhere along the way I realized that, as much as I love him, I couldn't let myself destroy him. I wished I hadn't let it get this far. It took a second before I snapped out of my mind and could hear his cracking voice calling my name. His hand was just about to reach the handle of the door as I pulled away; his body stumbling into the street as he watched me go, tears falling from his eyes.
