𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚎

𝚝𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚟𝚎

A/N: I wanted to put a couple of disclaimers here. First of all, I don't really know exactly how the Grammys work and I'm too lazy to look it up, so in this fictional universe, everything that happens is totally normal. Yup. Thank you for joining my delusional not-reality.

Secondly, I would like to say that there is a scene in this chapter based on an interaction Harry had with Trevor Noah, who was the MC for the Grammys in 2021 and 2022. The dialogue is almost word for word what Trevor Noah said. With that said, I don't want anyone to hate on him. The problem isn't what he did specifically, it's the way the media in general and even some of Harry's so-called "fans" see him. (This will all make more sense once you read it.) We are allowed to hate the unnamed Amercan comedian in the story, but please no hate to Trevor irl. I think it's horrible that people think these things about Harry, but it's a narrative they've been fed, and that doesn't make them bad people. Okay, that's all. Enjoy the chapter :D.

August 2010

They say your first time is always the worst. That every time after that, some little thing changes, until you find exactly the way you want someone to treat you, and exactly the way you want to treat someone.

Harry's first time is messy, and giggly, and uncoordinated, but ultimately perfect. He couldn't have asked for it to be better.

Besides, he's like 90% sure he's in love with Louis, so. There's that.

The day after he can't walk. And that's not him being dramatic. It's a good thing he doesn't have to perform, because he can barely shift his body weight without wincing. Louis does have to perform, but he comes back and cuddles Harry with the good news that he's still in the competition.

It makes Harry think. At some point, one of them will have to outlast the other; whether it's down to the top three or even before that. He realizes this is why they have rules about contestants dating each other. It creates a conflict of interest; while he really, really wants to win, he also kind of wants Louis to win instead, just to see how happy it'll make him.

But ultimately, Harry wants to win.

That's why he's here, isn't it? That's why he signed up for the X-Factor in the first place. The promise of fame. A career he'll be proud of. A hobby turned into a profession.

He looks over at Louis, and he sees a future. If Louis will have him that long, that is. But the X-Factor is his future too. He can't give that up, but he can't see himself giving Louis up, either.

Is it worth choosing the fame, if it means losing someone you care about?

***

It turns out Harry is nominated for three Grammys. Louis learns this from Liam, not Harry himself, because while Harry is a selfish asshole, he's also kind of humble. The light blush on his cheeks and his small smile when Liam informs Louis of his nominations reminds Louis too much of Harry's expression whenever he'd win something on the X-Factor. He decides not to dwell on it.

The Album of the Year and Pop something awards are given, and Harry doesn't win either of them, which should make Louis feel better, but it really doesn't. Not when Harry is sitting next to him getting progressively more drunk the more awards he doesn't win.

He almost feels...bad for him? Is it possible to feel bad for someone who betrayed your trust and broke your heart into so many pieces you don't even know how to go about repairing it?

Maybe Louis is being dramatic. Harry is a person, after all, and he doesn't like seeing people upset. Especially people he cares about.

Or, used to care about.