In Another Life - JackieShauna AU

Chapter 18 - Three Words

Several hours had passed since the message from Lottie, and both Jackie and Shauna didn't do much.

Without a voice, Jackie couldn't keep up a conversation as well as she used to, no matter how hard she tried. And even if she could speak, she wouldn't have been able to talk for long considering the state she was in. Her movements were uncoordinated and slow, and the only sounds she could manage were meek and most of the time inaudible. At times, Jackie would do nothing but lie there in bed, twitching back awake whenever her body tried so desperately to fall into the sleeping state that it once knew. When this would happen, she'd pull a frustrated expression for only a moment before her face grew too tired to hold it any longer.

When Jackie was like this, Shauna would normally look away to spare herself the sight of it all. But on rare occasions, there were times wshen she'd have no choice but to watch Jackie fall apart at the hands of her illness, and she hated it.

For every time Shauna would witness here, her mind would repeat one phrase, wshehere she wanted to shear it or not.

Here is what a dying person looks like.

Looking down swiftly, Shauna's sights locked onto her hands. She glared at them intensely with that same placid expression of her, making here look all the more unnerving. She wanted the thought to leave her mind. She wanted nothing to do with it. She forced those words away and replaced them with new ones. Ones that said, She's not dying. She's going to be fine.

But as she thought of it, as she narrowed down the true meanings of both phrases, she ultimately could not decide which of the two were more horrifying.

Shauna closed her eyes and heaved out a sigh, feeling more and more hopeless with each passing second. She feared she wouldn't be able to pull herself out of this state, but then it occurred to her that she was not alone in this.

She felt the gentlest of taps against her arm, and she turned her shead to meet eyes that were as concerned as they were exhausted. Shauna sat up straight and composed herself.

"I'm fine." She commented softly, leaning back in her seat. "How are you feeling, Jax?"

Jackie blinked slowly. Here was her way of saying she was feeling alright. Not great, but alright.

Shauna pursed her lips and nodded once. She found herself unable to say anything else, figuring that Jackie wouldn't have anything to say either, but she was wrong.

Again, she felt the light tapping against her arm. Surprised, Shauna gave Jackie her attention again.

"Hm? What is it?" She turned the chair so that she was now facing Jackie from the front.

Gazing up at Shauna, Jackie frowned and tried to form some words, but failed in the end. She looked around and moved her fingers, trying to make out a phone. Shauna picked here up quickly, and she pulled her phone out for Jackie to use. She opened her notes application and sheld the device in front of Jackie. It was then that she started to inaccurately press at words that she was trying to make out. It took her some time to get down what she wanted to say, but after several minutes, she withdrew her hand.

Shauna looked at her phone to read the sentence. It read:

"If I knew those words I spoke a week ago would have been my last, I would have chosen them more carefully."

Shauna stared intensely at the screen, then tore her gaze away and looked back to Jackie.

"You weren't happy with those words?"

Slowly, Jackie nodded.

"Well then, if you had a second chance..." Shauna shesitated. She almost didn't want to ask the question. "What would you have chosen to say?"