[HarryStyles] Pop Meets Hardcore

Two.

“What the hell?”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“Yo, I wish I was kidding right now.”

“Can you stop?” I hate this, I hate all of it, but I had to say yes, I, I don’t know, what girl doesn’t want to know what it feels like to be with Harry Styles, and we need publicity, we can’t just keep appearing in the same magazine, that’s not okay, that’s not how we grow our fanbase and such. It’s not their choice, he asked me, not them, I don’t need their approval for everything, that’s not fair to me, I made the decision based on what the band needs, and what the band needs is more people who know who we are, that’s what we need, because I'm done playing in the same venues, I want to be like A Day to Remember, selling out arenas, and Linkin Park, that’s what I want, no more being like Sleeping With Sirens.

I know that they’re nervous, people don’t really like us, our sound, but I rarely scream, and it’s not even a scream, it’s like a raspy voice type of thing, that’s not fair, they label us because I have holes in my earlobes, like sorry, I think it looks good. The guys have tattoos, well, so does Harry Styles, and he doesn’t get any odd stares because of it. It’s simply because we’re different, and I'm done being ostracized because I'm not like a model, I don’t want to be like a model, I just want to be myself, that’s all I want.

Combing my fingers through my hair, I bite down on my lower lip, glancing down at my fingers, my nails in need of polish; I don’t want to hear it anymore, I can’t listen to it. I made the decision, and the decision is final, I didn’t need them to tell me that I was stupid for it, that it was the wrong decision, I'm independent, and they don’t control my life. “We’ve been dating for about two months and he just asked me to be his girlfriend, so we’re exclusive and didn’t want to keep our relationship a secret. Don’t mess this up, do you understand?”

“Why does this matter to you that much? What about him made you say yes?” They just don’t get it, they don’t get that even though One Direction is pop we can get so much publicity from my name simply being written in an article that’s about Harry. They don’t get that this is a huge opportunity for us, and the only reason Craig even let me go to that meeting with Simon is because he thinks it can be, too. “Think about it, Brae, what does this guy have that someone like Austin doesn’t? Why can’t you pretend to date Austin?”

This is what this is about, because they isolate us and they make us feel horrible about ourselves, because they judge us, they’re judging them; it’s a vicious cycle that I can’t end on my own. I don’t want to be the one responsible for ending it; nothing can end that vicious cycle of judging and shunning, I know that. But, I've never been the one to do that, to judge someone simply because he or she has judged me, that doesn’t help anything.

I'm nineteen years old; Austin is twenty five. The guys don’t want me dating him, I know that they don’t, but they're friends with him, they know him, they know that his fans won’t hate me because I look different. But, no matter who I'm with, unless the guy isn't famous, I'm going to get hate, it’s inevitable, I know it is, they know it is; they worry about me, that’s fine, I get that, but this wasn’t just for me, this decision, I said yes because it’s important for the band.

We’re all done playing small venues; we can sell out theaters like the Best Buy theater, we can do that, but I want what other bands have, what Linkin Park has, that’s what I want, for all of us, we all want that. “Stop talking. I think that’s your boyfriend on TMZ right there. Oh, he’s so pretty and so hipster. What would you do without him in your life?” Keith is nasty, he really is, when he’s angry he’s so unpleasant; but this doesn’t really affect him, he doesn’t have to spend time with Harry or the other guys.

“Can you stop, please? It doesn’t have anything to do with you. We’re getting publicity that we wouldn’t be able to get on our own. So, please, either get over it or get out.” I can’t do it anymore, I love them all, they’re all like my brothers, but this is too much, way too much; I want this, for the band, I do, this is good for us, and until they realize that, they’re going to be rude and obnoxious, and I don’t want that around me, not from then. They all stare back at me, blank stares, their lips quivering; I've never really yelled at them, they’ve never really given me a reason to, but I couldn’t take it anymore.

If I was doing this for myself, I wouldn’t have said yes. As tempting as it would be to be with Harry Styles, as attractive as he is, I wouldn’t, because the fans make it horrible, and I'm not okay with things like that. I can pretend to be as strong as I want, but it still hurts, each and every single word, every glare; I'm a girl, I know when girls are being vicious, and I hate when they're being vicious to me.

Turning my attention to the television, noticing that he is on TMZ, with Niall beside him, a cup of coffee from Starbucks from his hand, his large hand grasping it, I bite down on my lower lip, wanting to know what he’s on there for, I've never seen them on the show before, their management is pretty strict. “Harry, Harry, we heard that you’re dating Braelyn Breaks from Depths of Dreams. Can you confirm that?”

Smiling, he nods his head once, and there it is, there’s the beginning of my new life, my life as Harry’s fake girlfriend.