JJ Maybank Imagines

4th of July

So I know I'm a little late but this image is gonna be about how much y/n hates 4th of July and how the fireworks trigger her PTSD

⚠️mentions of PTSD and a school shooting⚠️

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                                                                             Y/n's POV

Today was my least favorite day of the year, 4th of July. Ever since I was little I hated fireworks because they reminded me of when there was a school shooting in 2nd grade, when my best friend Amanda was killed. It was really hard for me to understand at such a young age and it made me feel like I  matured faster than usual. Every year I tried to avoid them by taking a drive or walking somewhere quiet but every where I went there always seemed to be someone setting off fireworks near.  Every boom that went off I was reminded of when I was huddled in that tiny closet with all those other kids while some had to hide under the teachers desk because there wasn't enough room, and when the shooter came barging into the room after shooting down the door and searching around the classroom, then going over to the desk and shooting. This year the Pouges are trying to get me to come with them to the boneyard for a kegger and firework show, but the thing is I haven't told them about it, I've always found it extremely hard to talk about it with anyone even the people I'm close with.

"Come on y/n it's gonna be fun it's just a little fireworks nothing to be scared of!" JJ tried to reason with me but I just shook my head " No I'm ok" I said with a fake smile

The rest of the group looked at me confused on why I would turn down a kegger. "Are you feeling ok?" John B ,joked putting his hand to my forehead, " Yeah I'm ok I just don't want to go I'm not to big of a fan of fireworks" I said walking to go sit down on the couch with Pope and Kie. I knew they could tell something was wrong with me but didn't want to say anything.
JJ's POV
I could tell something was wrong with y/n but I couldn't put my finger on it. "Ok if you say so but you want to join us later on just call me and I'll come pick you up." Kie said walking to go grab the plastic Walmart bag stuffed with all kinds of fireworks while Sarah grabbed the cooler. " Thanks Kie I will." y/n said with a sad smile on her face while she pulled her knees up to her chest and out her chin on them. "Hey I'll catch up with you guys I'm gonna stay here with y/n for a little bit." I called out to them as they where loading up the Twinke. "JJ just go I'll be ok I don't want you to miss anything." y/n said perking her head up as she looked at me confused. "No I want to stay here with you to try and figure out why your acting like this." I said turning to her.
y/n's POV
"Acting like what?" I said trying to play dumb. "You know what I'm talking about, turning down a kegger and acting like everything is fine when clearly your hiding something." JJ said leaning closer to me. "What if I don't want to talk about it!?" I half yelled at him, I was getting frustrated on how he was trying to pry me open to see what was going on. "Fine then don't tell me but don't hesitate to call us if you need anything or if you want to talk about it later." JJ said walking to the door while putting his hat on. "Ok I will." I lied, I couldn't tell them even if I wanted to, because every time I let out my feelings I couldn't help but feel guilty afterwards that I was making people feel bad for me. After he shut the door I sat there in silence for a few minutes until I heard the first firework of the night go of BOOM I jumped, and looked around frantically for a place to go and hide to feel safe. I ran into the guest bedroom and got under the covers of the bed, trying to drown out the memories but they kept coming out.
"Hurry go hide in the closet." our teacher whispered to us trying to calm us down after we just heard the intercom saying we were in lockdown. "But Mrs.Star we can't all fit in here!" the little boy next to me cried. It was true, we where all stuffed like sardines in that closet every bit of space taken up. "Ok ok you guys stay calm, don't cry, don't make any noise and don't open the door unless I tell you or you hear an announcement over the speakers saying we are out of the lockdown, I'm gonna go hide under my desk with the other kids ok?" she asked as we all nodded and silently cried. After she closed the door I could hear her whispering to the other kids the same thing she told us. After a few minutes it was silent as we all waited nervously for something to happen, all of the sudden BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! We heard in the distance as our breaths hitched. Soon there was sounds of screams and cry's as we heard someone running down the hall. I heard the door knob to the classroom jiggle as a little girl gasped and started crying, we tried to calm her down so she wouldn't get the other kids riled up. As soon as she calmed down we heard a gunshot, BOOM! then the door falling in. We all heard them walking around the classroom with each step getting closer to the closet, I guess I didn't hear the front door open because I was snapped out of my trance and screamed when the door to the bedroom door opened , I scrambled to get out from under the covers and back away from whoever came in the room. JJ.
                                  
                                                                      JJ's POV
It had been a hour since we showed up at the boneyard with no sign of y/n so I decided to go back to the Chateau and check on her. "Hey John B im gonna go and check up on y/n." I called to JB as he was by the keg handing out drinks,  "Ok" he said with a thumbs up as he went back to filling up cups. As I walked into the Chateau I saw no sign of her "Y/n are you in here?" I said looking around, soon I heard small cries coming from the guest room, I opened the door and I heard a scream. I saw y/n moving frantically to get out from under the covers and back away from me. I slowly walked to her " Hey hey it's ok it's just me it's just me." I said holding my hand out to her, her chest rising and falling.
                                                                 y/n's POV
When I saw it was just JJ i calmed down a little still trying to get out of my trance "Hey hey it's ok it's just me it's just me." He said coming closer to me and holding his hand out. I stared crying even more and jumped up out of the bed to hug him. As soon as I hugged him he started hugging me back and whispering in my ear that I was ok and stroking my hair. After a few minutes my cries slowed and I pulled back to look at him " Why did you come back?" I asked actually wondering why he did come back even though I didn't text or call any of them. "I wanted to make sure you where ok Princess I hadn't heard from you for over and hour." he said while looking down at me with a worried expression. I sighed and walked over and sat down at the bed, staring down at the floor. My eyes started to tear up again as he gently grabbed my face and made me look at him. "What's wrong y/n why did your scream when I came in?" he said wiping my tears with his thumb. "I get triggered by the fireworks, when I was in the 2nd grade there was a school shooting and my best friend was killed along with my teacher and some of my other classmates." I said looking into his eyes while my eyes where still blurred from the tears. "Oh y/n why didn't you tell us? I would have never left you here if I knew that." He said softly pulling me into a hug. " I didn't tell you because whenever I let out my feelings or something that happened to me because I feel guilty for making the other person feel bad for me, and it makes me feel like I'm doing it for sympathy" I whispered. He pulled back and softly kissed me, " Don't feel bad for letting your feelings out, it's not making the other person feel bad it's making your mental health better and it feels better to let out your emotions instead of bottling them up." He said looking into my eyes, I just nodded and put my head onto my chest as he leaned back against the bed and he held me all night stroking my hair and calming me down. At last I finally felt safe
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Ok so this is my first image ive ever written please tell me how I did and what I can change/improve thanks❤️
Also you can talk to me anytime my dms are always open❤️❤️
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