N I N E T E E N

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Chapter Nineteen: Cea Mai Mare Frică A Unei Mame

Warning: mentions of a panic attack, angst

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HER breath came in jagged, uneven gasps as if her lungs struggled to draw in air amidst the suffocating grip of fear, each inhalation a battle against her own panic. Her heart hammered against her ribcage, a thunderous beat that rebounded through her body, matching the rhythm of her escalating panic. Her hands shook uncontrollably, an involuntary tremor that betrayed her as fear and panic waged a relentless battle within her. Her pulse throbbed in her ears, a drumming beat that drowned out all other sounds. Her thoughts swayed through a maze of scenarios, each possible outcome more terrifying than the last. Her vision blurred, the edges of her surroundings warping and distorting as tears clouded her perception.

The sight of the blood alone made her stomach churn. Anxiety curled around her, wrapping around her body like a boa constrictor, making her words catch in her throat. Her legs buckled, but the hands on her waist prevented her from crumbling to the ground. She grabbed onto his arm, clinging to him as if he were her only support. Her fingers dug into his skin, leaving red crescents under them, but she didn't care. She was desperate for something—someone—to hold onto, to keep her anchored in the storm of her raging panic and fear.

She felt a hand on her face, and when she lifted her eyes, she made out the blurry face in front of her. His eyebrows were laced together, sapphire eyes flooded with concern as he cradled her cheek in his palm. She could see his lips moving, but his voice never rose in her ears. Her lips trembled, and her hand grabbed his jacket, a choked sob passing over her lips.

"Aki!" Finally, his voice broke through the deafening silence, making her breath hitch. "Trebuie să te liniștești!"

He moved her arms, wrapping them around his neck as he swept her off her feet, carefully cradling her against his chest. She buried her face in his neck, her fingers lacing through his hair. She felt her head spin, a wave of dizziness swarming her, though it seemed to fade as soon as it came.

She could hear him shouting, though his voice was muffled as she buried herself further into his arms. She could hear other voices, and the rush of footsteps, and soon, Gojo was briskly walking forward. She felt her back ease against something soft, though her grip on the man never eased.

"Aki," He called softly. "You gotta let go so they can check you. I promise I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here, baby."

After a few moments, she slowly retracted her hands. Gojo stood beside her, his fingers running through her hair as doctors and nurses moved around her, connecting her to various monitors as they set up different equipment around her. A nurse drew the curtains back, creating a barrier of privacy as another one stood at the end of her bed.

"Okay, honey," She said gently. "We're gonna have to take these off so we can get a look and make sure nothing is wrong with your baby. She's gonna stick you with a little needle, but I promise it won't hurt for long."

Aki swallowed the lump in her throat as she turned her head. The other nurse smiled at her as she turned Aki's arm, easily sliding the needle into the inside of her elbow. She then looked over as Gojo unbuttoned her jeans, his hands shaking as he did so. Another one of the nurses draped a blanket over her waist as Gojo removed her jeans.

"Any bruising on the abdomen?" The doctor asked. A nurse lifted the hem of Aki's shirt.

"Slightly. How long ago did this happen?" She asked.

"I..." Gojo exhaled shakily. "Like...fifteen minutes ago? Sooner than that? I-I don't know."

"It's only early stages. Let's get the ultrasound machine set up."

She let her head fall back against the pillows, her eyes closing tightly. Gojo sat on the edge of the bed, brushing his knuckles along her cheeks. He moved stray strands of her hair away, hushing her when she would wince or whimper. He kissed her forehead, whispering to her that everything was going to be okay.

It felt like hours had passed as they waited. Aki curled against Gojo, her head resting against his shoulder as he rubbed circles onto her hip. Her cries had quieted down, and she was hiccupping softly, her tears drying along her cheeks. She played with the string from Gojo's jacket, trying to distract herself from her thoughts.

They both straightened when the door opened. Aki let her foot touch the ground as she sat forward, following the movement of the doctor with her eyes. Anticipation filled them both as the doctor grabbed the chair and drug it closer to both of them.

"You both can relax," He said, his lips pulling into a smile. "Your baby is perfectly fine."

She released a breath that felt like she'd been holding for hours. Her shoulders sunk as she dropped her head, the tightness in her chest fading. Gojo wrapped his arm around her shoulder and allowed her to lean into his side.

"What was all the blood about?" Gojo asked.

"The bleeding that Akeldama experienced is something called an implantation period. It's caused by the fertilized egg embedding itself in the lining of the womb. This bleeding is often mistaken for a period, and it may occur around the time your period is due," He explained. "The cramping you felt earlier in the day was probably the start of it. The force on your abdomen may have caused a little more blood than what was expected, but rest assured, the baby is in perfect health for this stage."

She looked up at Gojo, her face flooding with relief. He smiled softly, pressing his lips to the side of her head.

"But, just because of the scare," The doctor continued. "I'm ordering bed rest for a few weeks. Over-exerting yourself can lead to this being a high-risk pregnancy, and with how much blood you lost initially, it could have been cause for concern."

"Mulțumesc," She whispered.

"I also have this," He reached into his pocket, holding a piece of film out to them. "Congratulations on your baby. Take it easy."

Aki took the photo from his hands, sitting up as she looked down at it. Gojo laid his head on her shoulder, placing his hand over her stomach. Her hand joined his, her shaky exhale turning into a smile as they admired the ultrasound photo.

"There's our little cutie," Gojo whispered. "Bet you it'll look just like its Mama. Pretty butterscotch eyes and beautiful black hair. The softest skin and cute little freckles."

"I don't have freckles," She mumbled.

"Yeah, you do," He hummed. "On your shoulders and your cheeks. You never seem 'em until you get out in the sun and get your tan, but they're there."

"I'm surprised you notice that," She laughed airily, leaning against him.

"I love you, Akeldama," He chuckled. "I notice a lot about you."

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