Christmas Lights

Chapter 10

Karina wasn't sure if Winter even remembered last night. It was the next day; Winter she wasn't exactly in the state to discuss what happened – she was incredibly hungover. They had a quiet morning aside from a few pained grunts of acknowledgement from Winter.

So yeah, nothing was discussed.

It was only later that day, when Winter was more (or less) back to her usual self that things really shifted for Karina. Winter was reading on her couch and Karina had her work sprawled on the kitchen table. She was hunched over one of many journals and textbooks, going over her notes from her thesis advisor. Her last draft came back with red pen all over it, so she was re-editing the re-edits. She read her sentence for the third (or fourth?) time, the words not making sense so she closed her laptop.

Karina leaned forward onto her arms. Goddammit. She just wanted to be finished already. She was at that stage where she wanted to just give up, drop the program, stay a minimum wage book hock for the rest of her life. She thudded her head against her laptop.

The sudden feeling of two firm hands massaging her shoulders made her head spin – in a good way.

"Karina, you've been working at this for hours today. You should take a break," Winter's voice said, gently working at the knots on Karina's back. Karina groaned involuntarily – at Winter's strong hands and at the mountain of work she still had to do.

"I have an idea," Karina ventured, moaning as Winter's thumb pressed against a particularly sore spot, "how about you become my sugar mama and I quit school."

Winter chuckled. "While that sounds awfully tempting, I'm not sure...you're definitely beautiful enough, but if I'm going to have a trophy wife, I kind of like my girls smart and nerdy."

And in spite of herself, Karina blushed, something in her chest fluttering. "I'm none of those things, cupcake," she said, pouting a little.

"Right, says the beautiful girl surrounded by academic journals and photocopies of stuff in languages I had no idea you read from the 1600s." Winter stopped massaging her shoulders and knelt next to her, on the floor. Karina opened her eyes and turned her head slightly, not lifting it off her laptop.

"Is there anything I can do to help? I know doctors are supposedly bad writers, but I actually think I'm pretty good at it. I took a couple journalism classes in my undergrad and I considered doing that, but the Dean of the Faculty of Medicine was kind of hot and that convinced me..."

Winter trailed off; she reached up and cupped Karina's cheek, tracing her thumb along her cheekbone.

"Hey." Winter grinned.

"Hey," Karina said.

And in that moment, seeing Winter, her hair tied up in a messy ponytail, in Karina's shirt, Karina realized something.

She was happy. Or, rather, she could be happy. She had been apprehensive about her relationship with Winter. She was scared of getting hurt again; she always got hurt. She had never gotten a happy ending. She didn't know if she'd get one ever.

But every minute she wasn't with Winter was torture and she realized in that moment that all the caution she was taking was for nothing. She had feelings for Winter. And she was finally in a place where that was enough. It was more than enough.

She was sure. She was ready.

She had to tell her.

"Do you remember last night? Like, when we got home," Karina asked suddenly, sitting up. She turned in her seat, facing Winter. Winter got up and slid into one of the other chairs, a little taken aback by her abruptness.