Alina Kanaan

Chapter 26

"So verily, with every difficulty, there is relief." (Quran 94:05)

I wake up after who knows how long. I check my phone and see that it's around eight p.m. I slept for at least three hours.

I look at my phone, but then I realize there are flowers on the nightstand. They're roses, which are my favorite. The first person who comes to my mind that sent them is Aman, but I know that it's not him.

I look at them and admire their beauty. I also try to look to see if there's a name on them, but I don't.

I change into my pajamas since I'm pretty sure I'm not going out anywhere. I don't want to either. All I want to do is eat ice cream.

After I change, I realize that my engagement ring is on my finger still. I slowly take it off and put it in a bathroom drawer. I start to cry. I sit on the toilet and let it all out before I go to find my family and friends. I'm still completely shocked that this happened. I feel like I had a nightmare and now I'm in real life. Unfortunately, that's not the case.

I clean my eyes so the leftover tears don't show on my face. As soon as I open the door to go find my family and friends, I see my dad right in front of the door with his hand in midair. I guess he was about to knock.

"How are you doing, my daughter?" my dad asks me in Arabic.

"Better. I guess Francisco told you what happened," I say in Arabic. I can't look him in the eye for some reason.

"Do you mind if I close the door?"

"Sure, go ahead," he closes the door. We sit on my bed.

"Francisco told me what happened after you got back. I came to talk to you, but you were asleep. I didn't want to disturb you.

"I hate what Aman did to you. You don't deserve someone like that. It makes me extremely angry at him!" he says angrily.

"Baba, I need to tell you something," I say nervously. My heart begins to beat so fast.

"What is it, Alina?" he asks calmly. I can't believe I'm about to do this, but I have to or else I'll feel worse than I already do.

"Before Aman and I got engaged, we were boyfriend and girlfriend. I went to his house alone a lot of the time. That led to...led to...us having sex. Then, we got engaged. Shortly after that, I found out that I had a miscarriage. Day after day things got worse where Aman started acting different and he told me it was because of the miscarriage, but now I don't believe that," I explain. I can't look at my dad and I start crying. I can't bear lying to my parents.

I don't look up to see his reaction because I'm scared. I know what it looks like already. His mouth and eyes are wide open and he's shaking his head in dismay. That's the face he gets when something shocks him.

Instead, I feel his arm wrapped around me. He rubs my back.

I look up at him.

"Are you mad?" I ask him.

"A little, yes, but everyone makes mistakes. You're not hurt and you have the wisdom to leave Aman after what he did. I know that you're a strong woman, Alina and you know what to do. All of us make mistakes. Don't worry. I'm not completely mad at you and you're not getting grounded or anything. I can see that you've learned by your mistakes. Thank you for telling me the truth now," he says in a calm tone.

"Thank you, baba," I say. I'm a little relieved because he didn't get as mad as I thought he would. It's funny how people think Arab men are strict and violent, but my dad is anything but those things.