Living with Alzheimer's

From the Beginning

Life is difficult, but it seems to be getting a bit better. Everything seems very blurry and quick. I guess you would be kinda confused, so I will start from the very beginning. The place where everything seemed fine. The place where I still had a full family who knew me; and loved me.

My name is Beth, Beth Montgomery to be precise. I was a sophomore at Mount Jenkins High School in uptown Maine. A lot of people I talk to always complain about Maine, and about how cold it gets here, but to me, everything just works out perfectly. The weather is perfect for bike rides along giant cliffs that drop into the salty sea. I love exploring lighthouses that, even through storms, still stand. My life was good, really good.

"Beth Montgomery," Mr. Anders, said looking up from behind his glasses. My head lifted from the busy work we had been given.

"Yes?" I was anxious to get back to work.

"You have been asked to go up the front office. I guess you're leaving for the day." My substitute teacher waved me off, returning back to his computer. I signed and gather my things, sticking my pencil and work into my red Jansport backpack. As I stood up to leave, I could feel 44 eyes on me. I cleared my throat and proceeded to walk out of the silent classroom.

The hallways seemed longer than usual. I didn't mind school all that much. I loved learning, and even found joy in teaching others. I wasn't popular, but I also wasn't known for not having any social skills. I tried out for sports just like everyone else, and I missed practices, like everyone else.

As I pushed the door open to the office, I was faced with my older brother, who was a senior, and my two parents.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked with a smile. The smile slowly dropped after realizing no one else was happy.

"I'll let you know when we get home. This isn't the right place for you or your brother to hear news like this," my mom's voice was cracking. My dad held the door open for Jake and I as we all stuffed into my mom's small work car.

The ride home was silent, and unanswered questions soon rolled into my mind. What was going on? Why is everyone so depressed all of a sudden? I wished to have my questions heard, but I didn't dare break the silence. Instead, I watched little raindrops form and run down my window.

After about 13 minutes of cold, hard silence, our little blue Jetta came to a stop. Finally! I thought I was going to die. I walked inside, catching a glance of my older brother. He also looked confused. His face had questions written all over it.

"Come, sit," our mom sat down in our living room, car keys still in hand. She patted two couch cushions next to her. My brother and I looked at each other and sat down, quietly. Dad sat across from us in his Lazy Boy rocker. I could tell by his look he wasn't really there, like he was looking off into the distance, thinking about something. It wasn't like him.

"Where's Aaron and Aimee? Shouldn't they be here? I mean, it looks like you guys are going to tell us something important. They should be here, if you are," I blurted out. Everyone just sat and looked at me. Slowly, ever so slowly, my mom had tears forming in the corner of her blue eyes.

"Sweetie, Aaron is dead," my mom burst out into a fit of tears. My dad came up from behind her and hugged her shoulders. Were they serious? I looked over at Jake, my older brother, and realized they weren't kidding. Everything else came in a hurry. The last thing I remember was getting up, and running out the front door. I didn't know where I was going, but I just let my feet carry me out into the pouring rain. My older brother, who took me everywhere couldn't have died. There was no way! He was in track, just like me. The doctors said he was expected to live a long time! I became angry and ran faster into an open park.

I stopped when I came to a giant oak tree right in the middle of the swampy park. I collapsed into a tangled mess of tears. Why my brother? Aaron was my role model. Everything he did I wanted to do, everything he was I was. How could he just leave in a heartbeat? I sobbed thinking about my brother and all the things he did with me.

While he was in Collage, he took me to my first concert. I didn't know who the band was, but I ended up enjoying all the songs that were played. Aaron had been going to school to major in Medicine. He wanted to be a surgeon for military veterans. He had his whole life ahead of him! He's worked hard for what he wanted in life. He put off so many things, just so that he could accomplish his goals and dreams.

I remember one time he was dating this girl, and things were getting pretty serious. She had gotten a job in Connecticut as an X-ray technician and wanted him to move with her. He decided against it because he was still in school, so he ended the relationship with her. He knew that if he moved in with her, he wouldn't be focused, and probably wouldn't reach his dreams. Grades were important to him, and I think that's why they are important to me. My whole life felt shattered.

"Beth?" I felt a hand on my shoulder. I didn't need to look up to see who it was. I grabbed his hand and pulled him into a hug. Jake put his arms around me and hugged me. He hugged me so tight, I felt like he was never going to let go. So, there we were, standing in the middle of a swampy park, under an oak tree, with the rain pelting us. Things couldn't possibly get any worse. Or so I thought...