as it is || harry styles au

thirty-three

tw // depression, suicide

h a r r y

"Ivy, it's getting late."

She sucked in a breath, coming out of her trance.

The sun was high in the sky, dipping further into the afternoon. Despite this, there was a chill to the air, so a little bit ago, I'd grabbed a throw blanket from the car and tucked it around her shoulders. She was so lost in her head, she hadn't even noticed I'd done so.

I worried.

She hadn't told me much, but from what she did tell me, I gathered that her mind was trying to take her back to some very traumatic moments.

For nearly an hour and a half, she sat there looking out at the river. It was eerie to think that just meters away was where I used to stand—thinking, wondering, worrying—and where I'd almost taken my life.

She turned her head to peek up at me standing behind her. My hands were tucked into the pockets of my pants, and I tried hard to make it seem like I wasn't thinking about what I was thinking about.

She patted the ground beside her. "Sit with me."

I was about to, but I heard the sound of a car pull up and squealing breaks. When I saw it was Alden, my heart sank and disappointment grew because I knew exactly why he was here, and it wasn't just random timing that he just so happened to drive by.

He got out of the car quick, leaving the door open, eyes ablaze. I knew he hadn't yet seen Ivy because he was hauling ass. "Harry, wh—"

I cut him off. "Alden."

He looked behind me to where Ivy had come to stand up. Surprise shone on his face. He stopped about ten feet away, visibly relaxing, shoulders dropping, and eyes falling shut.

Come on, Ald. Who the fuck do you take me for?

"Hey, Ald," Ivy piped in.

"Hey," he responded, assuredly trying to shake off the scare he'd given himself for no fucking reason.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, blissfully ignorant.

I didn't know if he planned on answering or not, but I spoke up first, my reply aimed at him. "He's checking on me."

Ivy touched my arm, and I felt a warmth spread through my chest. She followed as I approached my brother.

Alden focused his sights on me. "What are you doing out here?"

Oh? You want to do this right now?

"I wasn't feeling well and needed some fresh air, so I asked him to stop here." Ivy answering for me was a surprise, but it was a hell of a lot better than whatever spur of the moment avoidant bullshit was about to come out of my mouth.

"Reluctantly," I added.

He jutted his chin towards Ivy with a question plain for me to see in his eyes. I shook my head. No, she does not know.

"Let's just head back to town," Ivy suggested, releasing me and starting to walk back towards our car.

What a great idea, I thought.