The Blazing Rebellion

Chapter 55

John POV

Sera stared at him for a moment, her dark blue eyes full of confusion. John didn't flinch. He'd made his decision; he had to protect her, and for him to do that, she needed to leave Spectre. It was just too dangerous of a group. After everything that had happened with him, too, John didn't want to trust an organization like Spectre. There was just too much of a chance something could go wrong.

"John," Sera finally spoke. "I'm not going to quit."

He shook his head. "Sera, it's too dangerous. You're not safe there, and if I lose you-" He cut himself off, knowing that finishing the sentence would only lead to further pain. I just can't lose you too, Sera. Please understand.

She sighed. "I know. I also know not to fully trust them. The thing is, though, that I'm not sure if I can leave at this point..." She trailed off, biting her lip. Now it was John's turn to stare at her.

"What do you mean?" He demanded, already scared of the answer.

"They have my ability," She told him. "I need it back. It's too much of a risk if I leave now, too... they could send someone after me, and I couldn't properly defend myself. Spectre is too powerful of an enemy."

There was a moment of silence. That thought hadn't occurred to John, though it made perfect sense. They'd sent Sera on a lot of missions; she knew too much about them. If she left, they wouldn't let her go in peace. They would likely send someone after her. Spectre had already taken her ability, after all, and practically used it to blackmail her into joining them. What would they do if she tried to leave? He bit his lip. No, the risks were too great for that to happen.

Still, there had to be something else he could do. If Sera was always leaving for Spectre's missions, he could never know for sure if she were safe. He'd known she couldn't always be by his side; no one could. Still, he didn't want to be forever stuck wondering if she was alive, waiting for her to return.

"We didn't come up here to talk about Spectre," Sera told him, distracting John from his thoughts. He frowned. "We came up here so you could relax, and calm down. I don't think this is helping."

"Spectre is keeping me from calming down," John answered, standing up. He couldn't fight the rage that had begun to pound through his head. His emotions had only become more uncontrollable in the past week. "You're not safe with them! You could get hurt!" His voice raised with every word. He had to force himself to sit down again, sighing at the helplessness he felt. Useless. You won't even be able to save her.

Sera put a hand on his arm. The warmth of it made John relax a little, even if his mind was still spinning in circles. "What happened earlier, in class?"

"I was just... thinking about all of it again," John admitted, avoiding her eyes and sighing. It all came and went so fast, leaving him feeling constantly disoriented. He hated the feeling of being trapped inside of his own mind; it took everything he had not to constantly dwell on everything that had happened. Even then, he couldn't stop hating himself for it. He couldn't even come up with a solid reason why. After all, he hadn't been the one to injure his parents.

Sighing, John squeezed his eyes shut. No. I'm not going to think about all of that again. When he opened his eyes again, Sera was staring at him. Great.

"Is everything-" She began. He cut her off.

"It's fine." He bit his lip, knowing that his answer was a complete lie. Nothing was going smoothly. Nothing in his life had gone right for a long time. It seemed that every time things got better, they just got worse again, and he had no idea how to put a end to that. Sighing, he rested his head on one of his hands. "No, it's not. I just can't stop thinking about Spectre. I don't want you to get hurt, Sera."

She sighed, staring at the door of the roof. He knew she had nothing to say. There was nothing to be said. It was too much of a risk for her to leave Spectre; she was in it too far. Staying in, however, proved to be equally dangerous. They could easily send her on another mission, maybe this time one where she'd get caught. She'd nearly been stuck with the last one, when her ability had stopped working.  Is there no way for her to get out of this, for everything to work? He sighed. He could make sure she stayed safe at school, at least, even if it wasn't too dangerous.

That didn't give him the same reassurance. Spectre was so much more of a risk. He couldn't see anything that was going on there, unless-

John paused. There was one way that he could make sure Sera was okay, and take care of the last person he had. Slowly, he turned to face her. "I have an idea."

She frowned at the expression on his face, shaking her head. "I can already tell that I'm not going to like it."

Ignoring her words, John continued to speak. "What if... I join Spectre?"

Sera stared at him for a moment as if waiting for him to say he was joking. When he didn't, she sighed and shook her head firmly. "No. That's an awful idea."

John didn't answer her. He'd already decided. If he were a part of Spectre, then he could easily make sure they didn't send her on any mission that was too dangerous. If they did, too, he could be there to join her, to protect her. He didn't care if he was hurt, as long as she was okay. Anything for her.

Although he knew his thoughts were a little bit too extreme to make this an entirely safe idea, there was nothing else he could think of to do. He was going to join Spectre, whether Sera liked it or not.