The Blazing Rebellion

Chapter 8

John POV

She hadn't told him. John had given Sera the chance to confess what she was hiding, to tell him whatever Spectre was and how dangerous it was, but she hadn't taken it. Instead she'd made excuses once again and left.

Now John knew how it felt to have someone lie to him. It was a terrible feeling. He'd forced himself not to call out as Sera disappeared around the corner, to tell her to come back, not to go and do the dangerous things he now knew she was doing, but it had been hard... John had been unable to stop himself from taking a few steps towards her back as she vanished. His hand had twitched at his side, wanting to reach for Sera's arm, and he had almost let it.

The only thing stopping him from chasing her was the fact that she hadn't told him. She hadn't trusted him to tell him what she was doing. She'd denied it all and left him. Even though there were other students at the front of Wellston, and although more and more began to file out as school ended, John couldn't have felt more alone in that moment. It was almost like Sera had left him again, after their argument when she'd found out he was Joker... John shivered. No. That can't happen again. If I lose it all a third time... He squeezed his eyes tightly shut, burying his worries as deep as he could.

Eventually John forced himself to move. He dragged his feet back to his empty room in the Wellston boy's dormitories, wishing that Sera was there with him. She didn't even have to tell him everything, not right away... he just wanted her company. Maybe that would stop the loneliness that was slowly creeping up on him at the thought of Sera leaving. Stop it. It's not like she left you, she was just doing something outside of the school. Calm down.

Unfortunately, that was proving to be close to impossible for John. He opened the door of his door with a sigh, flopping down on the couch once he'd taken off his shoes. He glanced over at the doors in the room. Blyke, his original roommate, still hadn't come back... He must be crashing with Isen still. Good. John didn't really want to see him, not after the memories that had flown back when he'd seen Blyke in the hallway earlier.

That moment seemed so far away now that Sera was gone and all he wanted was to see her. John still hadn't answered the question he'd begun to ask himself... was it his fault Sera hadn't told him? Was it his fault she didn't fully trust him? Knowing myself and everything I've done wrong, it probably is.

He hated being so negative, but it was impossible to stop himself. What was worse, with every thought John was reminded more and more of the past. This was a bit like it had been. Now, John was stressing out over why Sera was hiding things from him instead of the other way... he knew that he wasn't handling it well, too. This time, though, John knew that no matter what Sera said he would continue to be her friend. Even if she really didn't trust him and the recreation of their friendship was a facade, he still wanted to take care of her.

After she'd saved him from himself John felt something different towards Sera. It was similar to the feeling of their friendship and the joy he had whenever he hung out with her, but... stronger. He didn't have any good explanation for it. All he knew was that this time, he couldn't lose her.

Sighing, John decided to go to sleep early so he could try and forget all of it. He took a quick shower and changed out of his uniform. Then, he slipped under the covers of his bed and stared at the opposite wall. He closed his eyes. Sleep didn't come easily, but he didn't have anything else to do... it was too late to follow Sera, anyway.

What felt like hours later John finally fell into asleep. Unfortunately, he didn't stay this way for long. Almost as soon as he'd stopped being awake, a dream crept into John's head.

Even in sleeping, especially when asleep, John couldn't escape the past...