Restless Cobalt

The Second Night Part Two

Clearly some unease must have shown on her face, because Ma's turned to concern. "Pumpkin? Bristlybristle? Is there something wrong that you want to talk about?" As if to illustrate her concern, she replaced the album back on the table, giving Bristle her full attention.

That was one of things Bristle loved about her mother. She didn't ask annoying open ended questions. Like when she wanted to know how their days went, she'd first ask if they wanted to talk about it, instead of just saying "how was your day?" She knew all three of them had trouble figuring out where to begin if she asked it like that. Bristle herself suspected she felt this the worst; it felt... paralysing.

Should she start at the earliest thing she did? The most important thing? The most exciting thing? The most recent thing, because that would be freshest in their memories? How much detail should she go into before they got bored – or cut her off? Starting things off with a few yes or no questions eased them into talking about whatever it was – if there was more besides the answer of yes or no that they could say, they had the opportunity.

Bristle remembered Wis saying something about how it felt nice and comfy and friendly, and Tis said everything felt more clear and organised. As for Bristle, she felt it was more fun; more like an actual conversation rather than just talking at somebody and not knowing if they were interested. It felt confrontational to ask; like she was accusing them of something.

Even Ma had mentioned something about it helping her; making the deluge of information more coherent and interpretable by breaking it off into more manageable sections. Pa found that logic agreeable, and he picked up the habit too, especially around the time they'd recap the day.

Maybe... if she said yes to this question, there would be a way of talking about this that didn't feel scary or confusing.

"I guess so," she said. Not "yes," but close enough. Ma nodded, having waited patiently for the response. She knew sometimes thinking time was necessary, especially with awkward or disquieting subject matter. She then looked over at the door to her bedroom, as if concerned about waking up Pa. Pa sometimes woke in the middle of the night for any reason – taking a walk, getting some water. He told them on rare occasions he got a snack, but never a big one, and it was only if he was planning on staying up for a while. If he did that tonight, he might get involved in their talk... if it lasted long enough.

"You said you were having trouble sleeping. Do you want to talk about that?" she asked.

"Yes," said Bristle. Good thing she didn't have to bring up the issue. She wouldn't know how to present it in a way that wasn't embarrassing. Forgetting how to sleep... what next, forgetting how to chew food? Forgetting how to breathe? She wouldn't know how to start; she'd feel all confused and wrong-footed.

It was like when they were asked a question with a super obvious answer in a lesson or something. That confused her, too – was it like a trick question? If the answer was very obvious and simple, why was the question even being asked in the first place? Was the answer more elaborate and more was expected than she thought? At least with yes or no questions, she knew how much answer was expected of her.

"When did this start?" said Ma. "I mean, when did you first remember this being an issue, you think? A few days, a week or two...?"

"A few days ago..." said Bristle, thankful she'd been given some options. It did help clear her mind a bit. Despite this, she still felt a little more detail was needed. "Not more than a week, though, I'm pretty sure." It certainly wasn't last spring – hopefully Ma wouldn't bring up comparisons to that.

"That adds up," said Ma, deep in thought herself. "The last few days, you have seemed quite tired and quiet. I ought to have paid more attention to it."