A Winter's Night

The Ostler

"And your father didn't do anything to stop him?" Tim looked furious as he dumped slop in the pig pen. Tim was the ostler and the only friend I'd ever had. With dull brown hair and and deep brown eyes, I couldn't deny that he was good looking. Then again, he's the only man I'd ever been acquainted with that wasn't drunk.

"Has my father ever tried to stop someone from defiling me?" I waded through the knee deep slop, climbing the waist high fence out of the pen. "Of course not!" Tim's jaw visibly clenched.

I knew he had a fancy for me. Ever since we were children, I knew. Though, shy and humble as he was, he'd never admit it. And I guess he wasn't all that bad. I knew that unless by some miracle the Highwayman remembered our one meeting, Tim would be my only way out. I figured if I ever did marry, it would have to be him, since I knew no one else.

"I just can't believe that such humans exist! Not humans...monsters!" He was seething, and I wished to soothe him.

"Tim, it's not all that bad."

"Not all that bad? You're seventeen years old!" The wood he was now chopping was splinters in his angered hacking. "I promise, Emerald, one day when I get enough money, I'll take you away from this cursed dungeon! Give you the life you deserve!"

I smiled. He was sweet, but unfortunately, I just couldn't force myself to feel that way towards him. Though, if the opportunity presented itself, I would surely leave with him, even if it meant marrying him.

"Thank you, Tim. You've always been my only true friend." Tim put his arms around by in an embrace. Gratefully, I returned it.

"Where are you, girl?" I groaned inwardly. There was my father, making his way towards us lopsidedly, his words a jumble.

"I'm right here, Father." I waved shortly, just in case he hadn't already seen me.

"Good." His voice was gruff and angry, as he always was. "But girl, if you're going to fool around by the pig pens, at least make sure it's with someone with a future." That infuriated me.

As if any of the men of the inn had any sort of future! At least Tim worked hard for his possible future! I glared at my father, and could literally feel Tim's cheeks pink with embarrassment and hatred.

I turned to my father, who had less of a future than anyone, and did the first thing that came to mind.

"That's exactly what I'm doing." And I turned and kissed Tim.

We'd never kissed before, but I kissed him like I never imagined I would. I was lightheaded and faint. Pressing my body firmly against his, I made a show for my father. Tim's arms wrapped around me, pulling me, if possible, closer to him than before. It was then I realized my mistake. Tim was in love with me, and he thought I was truly doing this in affection for him.

I pulled away from him, our lips but a whisper apart. I heard my father grumble in the background something about not doing that for the men of the inn and more business for him as he wobbled back for another drink.

"I'm sorry." I whispered pathetically to the ostler. His eyes were half closed, as though he were drunk.

"Emerald..." was all he got out before he crushed his lips to mine once more. I returned the kiss fervently. It wasn't until I realized how intimate the exchange was that I knew I had to quit. Breaking away, I stared into his deep eyes. He gazed at me.

It wasn't fair. I couldn't lead my dear friend on. I had to let him know that I didn't feel the same way for him. But how?

"Tim, there's something you should know..." I looked into his gentle eyes and felt deep pity. "I don't love you. Not like that." I had to keep speaking when I saw Tim's face fall horribly. "You are my only and closest friend. You keep me company when I'm sad and protect me from the vile creatures of the inn. But I can't lead you on like this. I'm sorry." Tears were riveting in streams down my tender cheeks. Tom simply stared at me, almost unbelieving.

After what felt like several agonizingly painful hours, Tim clenched his jaw, his eyes turning a cold shade of loathing.

"What is it?" He took a step back, acting like I was something disgusting he stepped in. "Do you love someone else? Am I not good enough?"

He wasn't shouting, though he might as well have been. There was something almost creepy about the way he was so calm and collected; something that made him seem almost more angered. It was as if he was already planning some sort of revenge.

"No! Tim! There's no one else!" I was pleading desperately, wishing I could take back this decision and pretend to love him. I grabbed onto his wrist, hoping it would be enough, knowing it wouldn't."I just...I...please!"

Falling to my knees in the dirt, my skirts billowed around me as I watched the ostler yank his wrist from my pleading grip and walk coldly away.

I had lost my only friend and escape.