Chasing the Game

Chapter 9: "The moving on and healing process"

Chapter 9: "The moving on and healing process"

NARRATION:

I couldn't take the resentment, but after the day we had closure, I never talked to him. I blocked him from every social media platform where we're mutual. I even deleted his number from my phone. I tell my friends what the fuck just happened to both of us. Luckily, I have friends that I can lean on. I was so hurt and don't even fucking know if I can move on from what shit happened to us. But as the day passed by, my friends were making me calm and giving non-stop advice so that I could wake up from reality.

Months have passed and now I'm getting better day by day.

Yes, the pain will always be there.

So will the fear.

But the pain and fear are no longer part of my life. They're only moments.

From now on, I'll never settle for less. I deserve much better than the bare minimum that wasn't supposed to be chased. I will never get dazzled by that kind of personality again. That fucking Tristan makes me not want to love again. Those bad memories can't help you.

The ugly parts of love can't lift you up.

They bring you

D

O

W

N.

They hold you under.

Drown you.

You look up and think, "I wish I was up there."

But you're not.

Ugly love becomes you.

consumes you.

It makes you hate it all.

makes you realize that all the beautiful parts aren't even worth it. Without the beautiful, you'll never risk feeling this.

You'll never risk feeling ugly.

So you give it up. You give it all up. You never want love again, no matter what kind it is, because no type of love will ever be worth living through ugly love again.

A broken heart affects your feelings. Nobody links a shattered heart with joy. Similarly, I was devastated when my heart was crushed. I remember it feeling so bad for me that I couldn't do anything for a month. However, as time passed, I began to consider what lesson I might take away from it. It's pointless to grieve over spilled milk if you don't even try to prevent spilling milk the next time. It was not a pleasant procedure, but I discovered that by thinking thoroughly, I got something.

One thing I learned from this experience is to never ask about the past and never expect a future. I just came to the realization that acceptance is the only key to being truly free. As time goes on, you will begin to see the magic in the process. You will begin to understand why things happened precisely the way they did. You will realize that if you did not have the exact experiences you had just as you had them. You will never miss out on essential lessons, tools, and pieces of wisdom that built you into the person you are today-the person who will keep walking you forward. When you look back on the past, you can see the reason for everything that happened. Things fall apart to show you what is really important to you. Every day, life teaches us something new, something different. Things that are meant to stay in your life will manage to find a way. If it is written into your fate, it will happen anyway. Things that are in the right place have a way of sticking around in the long run. They will never be taken away from you. You will never be denied what is rightfully yours. And what is rightfully yours will find you soon. Sometimes God gives us someone who will only pass into our lives, either to be with you forever or just a lesson. Now, I'm blissfully having a good time and moving forward through what happened.

The time has come. I wasn't aware that your name was not affecting me anymore. The drip finally came to an end. I'm getting better and happier now.