High School Lovers ~L.S.

60

**self harm warning**

Niall and Zayn were still naked, just laying together and talking quietly. They were still a bit sweaty and pink in the face, but they didn't care. Louis and Harry had left 45 minutes ago and N&Z two were happy to be alone for a bit.

"When will your parents be back?" Zayn asked quietly

Niall rolled over and looked at the clock on the wall

"Eh.. 'round two. We've got an hour and a half"

Zayn grinned and reached up to gently poke Niall's cheek

"I love your accent"

"It's thicker now since I'm worn out" Niall giggled

"You can't make the 'th' sound" Zayn teased

"And you can't make the 'wh' sound" Niall countered

"Can too" Zayn argued

"Say 'whats happening' then" 

Zayn pouted because he knew Niall was right. He can't make the wh sound, it turns to a V because of his accent. And Niall knows Zayn's right too- he's Irish, so he says T instead of TH.

After a few more minutes of teasing and giggling and wide, goofy smiles- Niall's phone rang in the kitchen. He groaned and looked at Zayn with big pleading eyes.

"Fine.. but I want a shoulder massage" Zayn held out his pinky finger.

"Thanks, and fine" Niall locked their little fingers then Zayn scurried off to the kitchen to answer Niall's cell

"Loueh, hey" Zayn answered

"Zayn! I should've known you'd still be over there with Horan" Louis laughed

"Yeah, yeah. Whatcha need, mate?"

"Mum wants to get to know Niall better since we're friends now. Ask him if he can join me for dinner 'round mine tonight?" 

"Sure, one sec"

Zayn turned to look towards the living room and found Niall pulling his boxers up his legs. 

"Babe, you're going to Lou's for dinner tonight, okay?" Zayn said

"Sure, what time?" Niall asked and looked up. Then he blushed, because Zayn-his boyfriend- was standing there with absolutely nothing on.

"What time, Tommo?" Zayn asked into the phone as he smired at the blush on Ni's face

"Four"

"He'll be there. And tell Mum hi for me, yea?"

"Yea, got it, got it"

"Alright, lad. Imma get off"

"Ew, didn't need to know" Louis frowned

"I mean get off the phone- like, hang up!" Zayn laughed

"Oh.. well, yeah, okay, bye then"

"Love you, Loueh"

"Love you too, Zee"

* * *

Harry walked into his room and plopped down on the bed. He couldn't stop replaying his words, and Louis' words, and his ex's words in his mind

He wanted to- he almost could've kissed him that night.

He almost could've left Louis and went back to all that pain

He didn't want to, but he somewhat felt like he is supposed to

He still felt controlled

Harry felt loved for the first time and that felt like heaven

It was addicting- to be needed. To be caved. To be wanted. 

It was like a drug. He wanted to be something that someone cared about...

Harry glanced at his legs. He hated his legs. He doesn't remember the last time he wore shorts.

He glances at his wrists. He's always got bracelets on to hide his scars. Jeans hide his thighs. 

He hates the pain and regret and the rejecting feeling that he caused...  but he still feels addicted to him.

And he hates that. He feels bad and ... well, guilty. Anne said it would always be that way, but Harry felt so guilty. He felt that he was betraying Louis..

so

He traced the pale lines on his wrist, creating new, rose red, stinging ones.