Half Mad (Sequel to Half Bad)

Chapter 21

✖ Chapter 21 ✖

I STARED AT her a long moment. My mother. My mother. The words still sounded odd, even in my confinements of my mind. It tasted almost foul, the twist of truth practically being too much. I hadn't known if Cecilia was lying to get a rise out of me or not—and now that I did, I realized I wished she were lying.

But her eyes are so bright, so alive and genuine that I merely gave a curt nod. Rose squeezed my hand as if for good luck, or my own assurance, and I didn't want to walk away without her. Not even just a few feet.

I glanced over my shoulder at her, seeing she had her hand on Jessie's shoulder. He looked confused, pinching the bridge of his nose with his eyebrows nearly morphing together. Daniel and Aiden were close behind him, but they were still gawking over the queen.

Not being able to contain it, I snorted.

I sure hoped she wasn't expecting her son to be a giddy prince in the future.

"I wish to speak with you separately," her soft voice spoke, bringing my eyes back to her to see she was now looking at Jessie. "I've been told he had his mind tampered with." A frown pulled at her thin lips.

She sighed quietly, turning her attention to me once more. I stared at her another long moment, trying to piece together the thoughts in my mind but I couldn't even string those thoughts into actual sentences. It was more like my brain was spitting words and question marks that didn't blend together at all.

"Why?"

I didn't expect that to be the first thing that fled my lips, but it had. That question seemed to stick out the most in the jumble of words.

Leah—was I supposed to call her mom now?—looked only a little startled. "Perhaps a more specific question would be easier to answer," she said, once again as if she were speaking to a toddler.

Maybe she didn't mean anything bad by it, maybe it was just her natural tone, but it made me angry. "I don't know," I huffed, dragging my hands through my hair. "Why was I left with a horrible replacement as a father? Why had he killed the woman I thought was my mother? Why were you gone? Why hadn't you come sooner? Why hadn't you left a note? Just... why."

I was sure I didn't make sense, but Leah—sounded better than mom for now—put on a strained smile. "I wish I could have been there sooner," she told me. "I wish I never would've been taken away. But I was only protecting the two of you. Madam Larkin wasn't even supposed to know I had children."

Her hand came up to my face, the gesture soft and enduring, but I flinched away out of habit. She seemed understanding enough. "It pains me to know I missed the best years of your lives," she whispered. "That I don't even know what you looked like as a toddler, or a child. Can you forgive me?"

It was my turn to frown. I suppose it had seemed like I was blaming her, but I truthfully wasn't. I knew how maniacal Cecilia was, and I knew that this woman more or less couldn't have done anything to stop her. There was no need to forgive her. If anything, she was already forgiven for whatever it was she thought she needed to be forgiven for.

My main problem, I assumed, was where to go from there. What happened next?

So I asked her that very question.

She smiled. "Anything. The Council will be down away with and tried for their many acts of injustice. The building will be the palace once again and you and your brother are more than welcome to join me in my return."

Leah must've noticed my face fall a little, because she continued with a little laugh. "However, I understand that it might not be in your best interest to return. I'll accept that as well, as long as I get to see you like a mother should see her child."