Grief

Meddle

[ Shizuo- Why didn't you tell me about Izaya!? ] Celty's PDA was shoved in front of my eyes as soon as the apartment door clicked shut behind us.

I rubbed at the back of my neck, eyes flickering away from the 'gaze' behind the glass of her motorcycle helmet. "Sorry Celty, it's just..." My words died out on my tongue, there was no solid explanation I could grasp that Celty would understand.

Mostly because how was I supposed to explain something that I didn't even understand myself?

Celty waited patiently for a moment, expecting some sort of continuation before her shoulders slumped at my silence. [Are you doing alright?] She typed out hesitantly.

I chewed on the edge of my inner lip, careful not to break the skin as I took a moment to actually put thought into her question. Celty kept still, shoulders even while she once again waited for some sort of answer. Any words I thought of seemed to curl on the tip of my tongue.

I managed a hesitant nod.

I wasn't exactly sure how to answer that question... It's not like things have magically gotten better, even with the distractions. Not to mention the argument last night between me and Izaya was still fresh and has left things more than a little awkward and tense. But I suppose in a way I've been coping better than I was in the beginning...

[ Seriously, you don't look like you got much sleep, and with everything that's happened- I don't know, I'm just concerned for you. Especially now that there's an actual Izaya-ghost in your living room!! ]

A small laugh slipped out as I thought about how bizarre it must all be to Celty. Not to say it hasn't been bizarre for me either...

Far from it.

"Yeah- I didn't get much sleep last night but I'm doing alright. As for Izaya... We've actually been doing pretty okay." My voice lowered as I spoke, trying not to think of our argument the night before or his sisters, instead, focusing on the little things that have grown normal between the two of us...

Not of the times where Izaya's insulting me while I throw things at him in vain to quell my familiar anger... but when Izaya mutters out a reminder of an item I need to buy on a whim or when he fills the lonely air of my little apartment with subjects I hardly understand. But every topic- every word while he watches some ridiculously violent murder documentary, morphs into something of an almost pleasant white noise in my little apartment.

Celty's helmet turned, angeled directly at the makeshift-covered hole in my door.

[ ? ]

"Ah.." I turned away from the blatant sign of anger as if not staring at it would deny its existence altogether. "There have been a few... instances- But the door wasn't really-" A screen quickly gleamed in my face.

[ Do you need help getting rid of Izaya's spirit? I think I might be able to find something to purge him- or maybe exorcise him? ] Her arm was held firm, stretched out straight as she held her PDA for me to read.

I swallowed, jaw tightening shut.

This is what I was afraid she might ask. I took a deep breath lifting my head to a more sturdy appearance to fake some sort of assurance of confidence that I certainly didn't own on my decisions.

I couldn't decide if I faked the sense of conviction for Celty, or myself.

"No."

[ "No!?!" But Shizuo-! It's Izaya we're talking about! You two have hated each other since forever, and now he's literally stuck with you!? ]