s t a r s - yang jungwon

f i v e

friday.

dear jungwon,

friday was the day of the thing you had planned for us.

and let me tell you, you made everything worth it.
i'm not quite sure why you did it. did you know about me?

but i appreciated it more than anything.

you texted me in the morning telling me that we weren't going to school. we were skipping.
i responded with a 'why?' but you explained that everything would soon be revealed.

i was ready by noon like you told me to be and as i put my shoes on you beeped your car outside; i ran out locking the door behind me.

i got into your car, and you smiled at me and told me i looked beautiful.

butterflies.

the car ride was 3 hours long. 3 hours too long.

i asked you several times along the way, where we were going but you never answered, just simply laughed at me.

the whole journey you played the playlist i made for you, the playlist for us.

you still listened to it, and you bopped your head and sang every word the entire trip.

you pulled up at a car park and told me we had about a five minute walk.
we got out of the car and you made your way to the trunk. pulling out a blanket.

'we'll need this for later' you told me as you locked the car and made your way over to me.
we walked for a few minutes like you said, until we reached the beach. and on the beach a picnic. set out with rose petals and candles and a selection of food.

tears brimmed at my eyes as i was flooded with a mixture of emotions.

why would you do this jungwon?

why would you make me feel so special, if i was only your friend?

i wrapped my arms around you and thanked you, before you told me i should've thanked one of your friends called jake for this. he had set it up for us.

make sure to give him my personal thanks, please.

you let me throw grapes into your mouth as you caught them. you fed me sandwiches. and we laughed in the moment. this was another moment i would never forget.

you, me and the beach.

the sun started to set as i got flashbacks from the previous night and how we danced in the rain.

you opened the blanket and wrapped it around us. you wrapped your arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer in and letting me rest my head on your shoulder.
i sighed and smiled.
i wanted to get used to that feeling.
watching the sunset with the person who made me feel loved.
you.

it was magical.
and you made it happen.

i don't know what came over me for me to make my next move but i took the blanket and got up and ran away with it - i thought it was funny to tease you.

you got up and chased after me as we laughed. at eachother, in the sunset.
i ran as fast as i could, but knowing how fast you were, you were bound to catch up with me.

you wrapped your arms around me as we fell onto the sand. i caught my breath as i felt dizzy; my vision fogged as my head pounded but i had managed to control it without you noticing.
thankfully.

the next event. the next event made me realise just how much i loved you.

you put your arms out to stop yourself falling on me, and there you were; hovering over me.

you were on top of me and looking me in the eyes. my breath got shaky and my stomach was in knots.
and that's when you leant in.

letter five : friday. the letter that you, yang jungwon, were my first kiss.

you leant in and our lips fit together perfectly. you don't realise how much i had longed for this moment, to feel your lips against mine.
how long i had waited to share this moment with you.
i had liked you since we were children, and here i was - my wish of you being my first kiss, came true. you initiated the kiss and our lips moved in sync with eachother.
you pulled away as you leant your forehead against mine and let out a breathy laugh.

and you apologised.
you were sorry.
but why?
were you confused?
was it bad?

i told you not to be sorry, and you turned your body to lay beside me as we watched the stars.

the familiar friends i spoke to everynight about you.
the lights that would flicker when i mentioned your name.
the angels i called for help when it came to you.
and you were laying watching them with me.
it was perfect.

everything was perfect.

you are perfect, yang jungwon.

the car ride home was silent, but it was a comfortable silence. all i can remember was making it 20 minutes before falling asleep and then i woke up at you pulling up to my front door.

i thanked you for the day, it was magical. you made letter five special.

thank you.

jungwon, you were my first friend, first love and now you took my first kiss.

i leant over to give you a kiss on the cheek as i felt your cheeks heat up.

cute.

i waved you goodbye and turned to lock my door.

and i cried.

i cried for so long as soon as you drove away.

i cried about the day we had just had, i cried about the goodbye, i cried about how much i could love a person.

i cried because i didn't want to let you drive away that night.

i wish i had asked you to stay.

i grabbed my chest as i felt a shooting pain that could only be described as the feeling of someone stabbing my chest. i'm sorry.

thank you for today yang jungwon.
may the stars be with you tonight.

yours forever,
y/n